


It's All In the Game

by happilysurviving (orphan_account)



Category: My Chemical Romance, Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Chaptered, Frerard, High School AU, M/M, Phan - Freeform, football au, football players - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-26
Updated: 2015-11-04
Packaged: 2018-04-23 12:12:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 45,556
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4876357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/happilysurviving
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Even jocks have issues. Especially the closeted ones who have friends they have to kick off their football teams. And it gets even worse when they have to kick them off because of a homophobic coach.</p><p>But of course that's only the beginning as this is Dan Howell and he always has to have larger problems on top of the ones everyone else would believe to be impossible to handle. </p><p>Having Frank as his best friend certainly doesn't help or the head gossip guru in town as his mother but it could be worse, right?</p><p>I mean he could be in love with an opposing team's quarterback...</p><p>Oh wait.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. In Which You Meet a Dick of a Coach

"Alright boys, hit the showers!" Coach yells and I finish my last sprint across the field beside Jared.

"Oh... god..." I heave and rest my hands on my knees, leaning over to try to catch my breath. "Those kill me every damn time." I reach up and pull my helmet off before shaking my head, drops of sweat flying away from me. I straighten up as my friend does beside me.

"Yeah, they're the worst." He agrees and smiles at me through the face guard of his yellow and purple helmet. "It's like Samstrung wants us to die before we even start our first game."

"Exactly, fucking hell." I start out across the giant football field to the locker room, complaining about how sore my calves are after a full week of three-hour practices that make me finish all my homework at around two in the morning.

"Hey, Howell!" I hear from my left while I hold the door open for Jared. Turning my head, I see my coach waving at me to come over. I sigh and close the door after my friend and walk over to him, carrying my helmet like it's a bag of bricks.

"Yes, Coach?" I lean against the front of the bleachers and watch as he picks up a stack of orange cones.

"Well first," He grunts, walks over, and places the stack in my hands. "Take those. But I also need you to talk to you about something else I need you to do for me." He walks over and grabs the last cones and starts over to the storage closet. I feel my hands start to sweat and shift the cones in my hands, anxious for him to tell me what I need to do, both because I just want to go home and I'll basically do anything to stay on his good side. I watch as he opens his mouth slowly, his dry lips sticking together at first.

"Okay, so I need you to kick Iero off the team." He sets the cones down and unlocks a large metal door with a key around his neck as I gape at him silently. This certainly isn't a task I could ever expect.

"Frank? Isn't he our best player?" I ask him with furrowed eyebrows and my confusion clear in my eyes. Frank is our quarterback, has been for three years and over the past two summers has participated in six NFL training camps that only one hundred high school players in the country are invited to, a different skill focus for each month long camp. He's the clear cut best player on our team, possibly in the state, why the fuck would Coach want to cut him?

"Well, Howell." He sighs and kicks the stack of orange cones through the open doorway and against the wall, never once taking his eyes away from his shoes. "Let's just say I saw him kissing someone a couple days ago." He looks up at me and sighs again when he sees that I still don't understand. "Put those there." He points at the spot next to a rack of baseball bats and I set my stack of cones down.

"Why does it matter that he was kissing someone exactly?" I look up at him and feel my heartbeat speed in my chest. I wouldn't want to kick someone off the team if they murdered three of our classmates and ate one of the trophies, let alone because Coach caught them making out with someone. The fact that is is Frank we're talking about only makes this all worse. I doubt my stomach would feel the way it does now if we were discussing booting Tyler out.

"He was out back making out with this emo, which is already kinda concerning if you get what I mean," With a chuckle he closes the doors and starts to lock them, jiggling the keys before looking at me seriously. "But this particular emo was a faggot."

"Oh." I look down at my cleats and nod my head, fighting the urge to puke.

"So you'll tell him the news?" I look back up to meet his eyes and he raises his eyebrows at my reaction. I breathe in deeply before giving him a smile

"Of course, Coach. We can't have some fag on our team." It takes all my self control to not cringe as I use the awful slur that haunts me in my sleep.

"Great, glad I could trust you, Daniel." He smacks my shoulder and grins at me with his stubby yellowing teeth. "We can't have anyone who wants dick in 'em, or they'll try to get it from their team mates or worse- another team. Can't have anyone sucking face with the opposing team can we?"

"Right. I'll go tell him now." I turn away and rub my eyes with my hands before pinching the bridge of my nose. I take a deep breath and grab the handle of the door of the locker room, not at all ready to tell Frank.

"Oh and Howell?" I hear Coach yell, but I don't look away from my hand as I respond, afraid that my anger may be apparent on my face.

"Yeah?"

"Don't tell him that's why, okay? Just come up with something that he's been doing wrong or something. I don't want to have to deal with any bullshit over this. And after this, I'm promoting you to captain."

I then look up and see him with a huge smile on his face. I force a weak one onto mine and thank him before slipping into the hot room. I shake my head back and forth before starting to pull my practice jersey off my torso but it gets caught on my hefty shoulder pads and I struggle for a moment before groaning in frustration and ripping it off over my head. Once its on the floor I look up to see Mason staring at me oddly.

"You okay, dude?"

I sigh and nod my head.

"Yeah, I'm all good. Is Frank still here?" I rub my head and fix my fringe while talking to him, very nervous about this whole situation.

"I think so, probably just getting out of the shower or something. But he's gonna leave quick, I think he said he's meeting someone."

"'Kay, thanks, Mase." I give him a smile and walk over to the showers to see Frank stepping out with a towel around his waist. I blink a couple times and rip my eyes away from the tattoos that he's gotten from his cousin Adam, a scorpion on his neck, Halloween across his knuckles. He uses foundation to cover them during school so Coach and the teachers won't find out, but all the guys on the team know, Adam even did them for free on some of the linemen. 

Frank is a really attractive guy and also my best friend. I actually built up the courage to finally ask him out last year right after he invited Gerard over to his house which then resulted in a relationship that's been steady going ever since. I was heartbroken, but seeing how happy Gerard made him helped, his happiness will always be more important than mine, which is going to make this even more difficult.

"Hey, Frank." I walk over to him, my eyes flicking everywhere and rubbing my arm with my hand. "Coach wanted me to tell you something."

"Yeah? What's that?" He drops the towel to reveal his black boxers and I swallow, my throat trying to clog so I don't have to say it.

"Well, um..." I clear my throat loudly and whisper. "You're off the team."

"Dan," He places a hand on my shoulder and then removes it to pull on a Ray Toro t shirt, his favorite artist. I went to one of his concerts with Frank once, it was amazing. "You're gonna need to talk a little louder, and quickly, I'm meeting him." He meets my eyes and gives me a smile.

"Yeah, um well it's just..." I swallow one more time and look him in the eyes as he shimmies into his ripped blue jeans. "You're off the team."

Silence. Nothing comes out of him for at least thirty seconds, the only sounds being the rest of our team messing around in the other section of the locker room. I stare at him as he stops pulling his jeans on and widens his eyes in shock.

"What?" He gasps. I grab his shoulder as he hurriedly tries to pull his clothes on, almost tipping over in the process. When he's fully in them he looks up at me, panic in his eyes. "How can that be? I'm the star player, he said so just yesterday."

"Well he said it was um because of um..." I think, do I really want to lie to him or should I just say it's because Coach saw him? I know what I should do, but- oh god I'll just tell him. He wrings his hands together angrily while awaiting my answer. I lower my voice so no one else can hear. "He saw you and Gerard making out after practice the other night and didn't exactly like it."

"What? No!" He groans and throws himself down on the bench, almost landing on his bag."I already have a scholarship to Alabama State, it'll be taken away if I'm off. No! This is a joke, right? Please tell my this is a fucking joke, no!" Obviously getting emotional, he drops his head into his hands. "I don't have the money, my mom doesn't have the money to send me to school. I can't be off, no, and how will I tell Gee?"

I sit next to him and rub his hunched back as he starts to cry, his chest heaving and black hair still dripping with shower water.

"I'm so sorry, Frank I really am." I say quietly, bending down a bit in an attempt to see his face. But suddenly he snaps his head up and looks at me with red-rimmed eyes.

"But you're gay too, why aren't you off?" He practically accuses before I cover his mouth with my hand.

I shake my head at him and put a finger to my lips, no one can find out about my sexuality or my life is over. The only person I've ever come out to is Frank and that was a year and a half ago and I was in tears the whole time. He had told me it was okay and then came out to me right after, but I've been so afraid of rejection that I haven't told anyone else. I uncover his mouth.

"Sorry, let's just talk about this outside, okay?" He says, tears still in his eyes and wipes his nose with the back of his hand.

"Yeah, let's do that." I clap his shoulder and stand, grabbing his hand in mine to help him up. He picks up his large duffle bag and holds it with the strap on his shoulder, leaning a bit to the side so he won't tip over. He's not a very large guy, but his talent makes up for his size in football, I still don't understand how Coach can kick him off, he didn't last year when he caught him with Gerard snorting cocaine, but now he's sending him away?

I walk out of the shower area and through a row of lockers, Frank following me, and see all our team mates staring at us, wondering why he's crying and I look like I'm about to. I push open the door of the locker room and step into the ninth grade hallway. Frank keeps walking down the hall to the old locker we used to share freshman year and throws his bag down next to it before crouching and setting his jaw the way he does when he's upset but doesn't want anyone to know. I make my way over to him and sit to his left, knocking his bag out of the way. He looks over at me, his chin wobbling slightly, and starts to speak in a small, broken voice.

"Gee's gonna figure out th-that I'm not going to p-practice next week and ask why, what will I t-tell him?" I put my arm around him as his voice breaks and tears leak from his eyes again despite his determination to not let them. "He would never f-forgive himself, b-bad stuff would happen, you know that Dan."

"I know, I know." Gerard has diagnosed depression, one suicide attempt this year and cuts on his shoulders clearly displaying his mental illness. This could be the one thing that makes him topple over the edge. I rub the top of Frank's back comfortingly. "Just say you were kicked off for something else, you had stopped performing well enough or something, he'll never know."

"Yeah, yeah I guess I could do that... but you've seen me try to lie, it doesn't work." Frank rests his head on my shoulder and I rub circles into his shoulder with my thumb, my arm pressed between the old green and his neck. "And I swear he knows me better than anyone, well except for you."

I smile despite the somber situation, he thinks I know him better than his boyfriend.

"Yes, but you also know him well enough to know not to tell him that your relationship is the reason you're not on the team anymore." I tell him as he curls up into a ball, hugging his knees to his chest.

"Okay, okay." He lifts his head and shakes his shoulders out, looking at me with wet eyes and a wobbling smile. "I've got this. I've got this." I smile as he pushes my arms away from him and stands himself up, his hand pressing against the red metal locker behind him. He grabs my elbows and launches me up quickly. I laugh as he almost pitches me into the locker and he shoulders the strap of his duffle bag. "I've got this. I'm kinda scared, but I've got this."

"Yes you do, go on, Frank. You're all good." I massage his hard shoulders behind him and he turns around to give me a bone crushing hug.

"Thank you, Dan. And believe me, Coach can kick me off the team but I'm still gonna watch every practice, you'll see me on Monday, probably making out with Gee right in front of the dick." He tells me before pecking my cheek. I know that he's only faking himself out with the smile gracing his lips but I don't want to knock him down from this high.

So I just laugh and follow him down the short hallway to the gym exit doors, wanting to see Gerard. If he lets something slip I wan to be there to save his relationship. I sigh and put a smile on my face as we reach the end of the hallway.

Frank pushes the doors open and I see Gerard standing against a light post, long red hair blowing across his face and his eyes directed at his phone. My friend dashes out of the building and over toward him.

"Hey, Gee!" He screeches and runs into his opening arms. I laugh as he throws his bag to the side and barrels into him, making the pale teenager slam into his dark blue truck.

"Hey, babe. How was practice?" He grabs Frank's hips and kisses him quickly.

"Great! But I won't be coming to the next one..." He rubs the back of his head and I step behind him, setting my hand on his shoulder. Gerard furrows his eyebrows when he sees me.

"Hi Dan..." He turns to his boyfriend again after addressing me. "What's this all about?"

"Well, you see... Coach told me I'm off because I haven't been working hard enough lately. But I think I'm still gonna come to the practices and stuff to watch, then maybe I can convince Coach to still sign papers saying I was on the team. My scholarship would still be intact that way..." Frank says, his voice surprisingly strong the whole time.

"I'm so sorry, Frankie." Gerard says, pulling his boyfriend against his chest softly. "I'm glad you have a plan though and if it doesn't work I'll go talk to Samstrung himself." He kisses Frank on the head and then pushes him out to an arms length away, a caring smile on his face. "Do you still want to go to the diner? We can skip it and just head home."

"No, no. Let's go down to Gino's, it's all good. I really want a salad anyway, that practice was terrible." He wraps his right arm around Gerard's shoulders, pecking him on the cheek quickly.

"Okay, if you're sure." He smiles at Frank but then looks over at me. "Do you wanna come? It'll be fun, there'll be food and shit."

I shake my head and point my thumb back toward the gym doors.

"Nah, I've still gotta shower, I smell disgusting unlike Frankie over here who's fresh as a daisy. But yeah, you guys have a blast, just don't get crazy."

I wink at Frank and mouth "And don't get caught." He nods at me, understanding what I mean.

"Oh don't worry. There'll be no partying, no drinking, just want a veggie burger." Gerard says, smiling at me and bumping Frank's side with his elbow. He's in a surprisingly good mood today, most of the times his depression seems to have practically consumed him, a smile barely ghosting on his lips in a whole night. I accompany the couple to Gino's often but The Bulldog even more. They only go to Gino's when Gerard is feeling alright and The Bulldog when he just wants to drink his problems away in a nasty old bar. I've tried to convince Frank to bring his boyfriend to a specialist to get over what seems to be an addiction, but he refuses every time, saying that it might send him deeper into Hell than he already is.

"That's good, well you guys should get off, it's already eight thirty. And besides, I want to get a start on my homework, one essay due Tuesday but of course since teachers fucking hate me two on Monday." I groan and wave to them as I walk away, effectively ending the conversation and watch them hop into the truck for a make out session before Gerard gets driving. They're the two most infatuated people I have ever seen, I have no doubt that they tell each other just how much they love each other every night before falling asleep curled together, legs between each other's and Gerard's face resting on Frank's bare chest blissfully.

I open the door and walk back into the locker room but decide to just skip the shower and take one in the morning. I see Mason talking to two of the other guys on the team as I walk out with my own large sports bag with HOWELL sewn across the black fabric in red. I nod at them and one, Chase, waves at me with a smile while the others nod back at me.

I make my way out of the building and to my own car thinking one thing:

Will he really be able to keep this from Gerard?


	2. Pizza Makes Everything Better

"Oh thank god." I mumble as the bell goes off, signaling the end of the last period of the day. I let my blue pen fall out of my hands and lace my fingers together before extending my arms, cracking my knuckles and yawning. I drop forward and slump my arms, staring at my incomplete English assignment.

Frank groans beside me and sweeps his binder and notebook into his backpack, he finished his assignment twenty minutes before everyone else. He's absolutely brilliant, or at least when it comes to school, outside you wouldn't guess it with all the dumb decisions he's made. Like pissing off a huge drunk guy last night at the bar we went to while Gerard was off taking sculpting classes at the art school he'll be attending on scholarship next year. Frank's actions resulted in a large purple bruise on his right cheek that he didn't bother to cover with foundation, he only uses makeup to conceal his tattoos, he doesn't like the feeling of it in the slightest.

"Didn't finish the paper, Dan?" He asks me as I stuff all my school items into my bag, irritated by the only four and a half pages of writing in my green notebook covered in scribbles of footballs, band logos, and frowning cartoon characters.

"No, this whole class sucks." I mumble and zip up my stuffed backpack. I slam it down on the table in front of me and Frank looks at me with his eyebrows raised.

"What's up with you?" He shoulders his own black backpack with a drawing of a skeleton in a marching band uniform that Gerard sketched for him as a birthday present last year.

"I'm just so hung over from last night and your bruise is pissing me off so damn much, did you really have to defend your fucking Halloween knuckles?" I say angrily while standing and putting on my backpack, feeling weighed down by the textbooks and homework. Almost as brought down physically as mentally.

"Hey, you just said you were drunk, so was I!" He points out as we walk out of the classroom, the last ones of our class to leave. "When some guy makes fun of your tattoos sober you get defensive, but when you're drunk you get violent. That's just how it is, dude." I roll my eyes at his terrible excuse of an explanation. We continue down the hall, completely surrounded by students running to their buses, making out ferociously, throwing joking punches that actually do hurt although the victims will never say. I stop at the locker I share with Frank at the end of the hall, right next to a huge mural of a wasp, our school mascot. It looks less ferocious and more ridiculous though despite the fierce expression on its bright yellow face because of the bright purple jersey it's sporting with the name Jassper misspelled across the front. Someone was obviously thinking about their girlfriend's ass while painting and the art teacher was out back distributing marijuana so she couldn't correct the idiot.

"Still, what did Gerard say last night?" He leans against the green locker next to ours and sighs as I twist the combination lock to open our small tin cupboard that is supposed to be large enough to keep all of our school stuff in but is really only large enough for one backpack and a small Webster's dictionary that we keep in it for emergency English homework help.

"He may have smacked me in the head." He fixes his hair so it sweeps across his forehead the way he likes. Then he looks at me and breaks into a smile. "And then had me lay down so I wouldn't hurt anymore and got me some ice."

I shake my head at him and roll my eyes, Gerard really is perfect for my loser of a best friend. I pull my American History and Calculus binders out of my bag and place them in my locker as he tells me more about how they had spent the whole night cuddled up together, his boyfriend always trying to keep from touching the forming bruise but still pecking it with puckered lips tenderly every once in a while.

I sigh while zipping up my backpack. Don't get me wrong, I love to hear Frank talk about Gerard, he's always happy and smiling while doing it. But it makes me feel jealous and lonely, knowing that they get to go home to each other every day and live in their own apartment and just be in love all they want when I don't have anyone. And it only makes it worse that Frank was the one I was going to be with had his red haired boyfriend not come along right before I got the chance to even ask for a night at the movies that wouldn't just end in a fist bump and "see ya at practice" but with an "I love you, babe."

"Alright, well we better get to practice, come on!" He says while grabbing my wrist and starting to sprint down the hallway with a smile still on his face. I laugh at him as we turn around a corner and he almost sends me flying into a white cinder block wall.

"Wait, we? You're actually gonna come watch?" I ask him as we rush down a staircase, fearing for my life.

"Well yeah, Samstrung can't get rid of me and my gay that easily. I won't be bringing Gee today though or coach might say something about ruining me to him." Frank stops once we reach the door to the locker room. "I'll see you out there. I'll cheer you on from the stands with a fistful of Twizzlers, no Skittles today, I couldn't find any this morning. I think Gee ate the last of them during our competition the other day." He trails off and I laugh at him.

"Competition?"

"Oh yeah," He looks at me, smiling. "Who can eat the most candy in a minute. He got twenty-five Skittles, two Twizzlers, and a Snickers and I got thirty Skittles, two Milky Ways and three Twizzlers." I stare at him in awe.

"How the hell did you eat all that in such a short time?"

"My cheeks expand." He blows his cheeks out for a moment and then winks at me. "Now get in there and change, you don't have a lot of time." He pecks my cheek and runs out the side door that leads out to the football field, making me blush. I walk into the locker room and am bombarded with the noises and smells of all my team mates, making me miss Frank and his no screaming policy and sweet cologne. I shake my head and drop my backpack down where my best friend should be.

~~~~~

"Alright men, huddle up!" Coach blares his whistle and yells, causing me to look up from the weights I had been lifting on the mats he had set up in a small alcove in the bleachers. I release the large forty pound free weights from my grip and Harry walks out of the area with me, done spotting.

I see everyone else jogging over to Samstrung who's holding his small white board and a dry-erase marker in the middle of the field. Harry starts to run behind me and I follow after him, making it to the huddle just a moment before he starts speaking with his incredibly loud Boston accent.

"Alright, I hope you guys all had a good weekend, at least some weights being lifted, some pounds being put on." He gives us all a big smile, expecting that that's really all we want, to get bulkier. "Now I have a few orders of business. First of all, Howell here is the new team captain." He points his black marker at me and the team starts to clap as I slap a fake smile over my disgust of the team.

"So why is he the captain exactly? It's not like Frank's gone or anything." My teammate Keith laughs next to me.

"Well actually Martin, he is. I asked him to leave on Friday." Coach says, crossing his arms with an weak attempt at hiding his sadistic smirk.

"Then why's he still at practice?"

"What? He's here?" Coach looks at him with his eyebrows furrowed, obviously unaware of his former player's presence. He starts to swivel his head around in a pitiful attempt to find his former player.

"Yeah, over there." Keith points over toward the stands behind his back and he turns around to see Frank sat on a bleacher with a content smile on his face. A scowl appears on Coach's as the he waves an actual handful of Twizzlers at them while standing up and swaying his hips in a very homosexual manner to the song he's listening to. I muffle my laughter with my hand as he pretends to blow a kiss to Coach and then bites the end off a piece of the licorice with a growl that I can't hear but know he made. Samstrung turns around with a now flushed face.

"Well as you can probably tell from his behavior, he's a filthy fag. I caught him sucking face with some guy the other day and so I told him to leave." He shakes his head, looking down at the ground. "I'm sure you guys don't want him here any more than I do now that you know. But damn he was dating Aria. I guess Dan can have her now, right Howell?" He laughs and looks up at me with a smile. I look him in the eye and give a seemingly convincing smile while nodding. All the guys around me bump their shoulder pads against mine with devious smiles.

The football captain has always dated the head cheerleader, how could I forget about that? Fuck. That was one thing that had made Gerard and Frank's relationship difficult, they had already been dating for two months when Frank had to ask Aria out on a date, he had just been appointed captain. And now I have to date her, shit. I can feel the jealousy radiating off of everyone around me, but really I don't even want to talk to her. Of course eventually I'll most definitely be forced into fucking her as well, most likely on video. That's what they did to Frankie, it almost broke up his relationship. Gerard ignore his mere existence for three days, when he found the porno of his boyfriend and the cheerleader that Frank had told him meant absolutely nothing at all, which was an absolute truth. He hadn't even been conscious for the first five minutes of the video and throughout the rest he was absolutely shitfaced. I fucking hate her and everything I'm going to have to do with her. Like go to prom just to prove our relationship to my team mates. I'll have bring her to parties that I would normally skip completely, and to top it off I don't know if I'll be able to hang out with Frank anymore, let alone Gerard. She might end up dictating my entire social life. Shit.

"So in other news," Coach continues, having calmed down and pushed Frank out of his mind for the time being. "I've arranged that on Wednesdays and Fridays we'll now be hosting the Killingly Knights for scrimmages every week. It will help us with experience on the field against another team and since we compete against them then maybe we can figure out their strategies before getting out and playing actual games against them." He claps his hands and then rubs them against each other while looking around at all of us excitedly. "Alright now split into your practice teams, I want to re-position some of you now that Frank is out."

We all break away from the huddle and I swear I see his face wrinkle in disgust after saying my best friend's name.

~~~~~

"Fucking dick." I grumble as I exit the building after practice. Coach had kept us late to do some last minute weight training despite the common knowledge that doing weight work after running will only damage your muscles, not help them.

"What's that?" I jump, not expecting for Frank to be leaning on the wall beside the door. He's cracking his knuckles and I see some red spread from them to the back of his hand.

"Coach is an absolute cunt, nothing new." I take his hand and make him look at the back of it. "But this is, who'd you punch?"

He laughs and takes his hand out of my grasp, wrapping his arm around my shoulders afterwards. "Oh just a drugged Jay, he decided to grab me and pin me against the wall by the neck but I got him easily. It's not too hard to take a stoner in a fight. But don't worry, he's still conscious, Levi's just cleaning him up." I nod at him and he takes the strap of my sports bag off my shoulder and wraps it around his hand twice. I open my mouth to protest but he puts a finger to my lips and grins before running off into the middle of the parking lot to my Jeep. We had made plans to just hang out tonight earlier today, I don't have any homework due tomorrow and I can just do the rest of that English assignment tomorrow night and Frank doesn't have anything because he somehow always manages to figure out everything in about four point three seconds.

"Let's go!" He yells after throwing my bag down on the ground next to my car, cupping his hands around his mouth. I can hear him smiling as I start jogging over to him. "Were you this slow during practice? Damn, coach should've kicked you off, not me!" I start to sprint at that and push him by the shoulders against the car door. He laughs and jams his fingers in my sides to make me release him. I double over and rest the top of my head on his chest. I can feel his slowing laughter and look down at his shoes, not sure if I want to straighten back up with the risk of him prodding at me again. I only move when I hear a yell from the doors of the school.

"Hey, Howell, you the next fuck buddy little Frankie's going after?" I widen my eyes and turn around to see Zack smirking at me, arms crossed. I move over so that I'm standing next to Frank and look over to see him with a scowl on his face and fists clenched. I bump his shoulder with my arm and his expression softens as he turns to see my face. I jerk my head toward the Jeep we're leaning against and he nods, understanding what I mean. I bend over to pick up my sports stuff but suddenly hear him yell back at Zack from across the parking lot.

"Oh Zachary, I could never! I wouldn't cheat on your Dad like that!" I laugh and start to open the door to the car.

"Oh you're getting it, Iero!" Then the huge two hundred pound junior starts running over to us, a mere two hundred feet away.

"Oh shit!" I throw my bag in the back and quickly jump in the car as Frank rushes around the other side of the vehicle, howling at the lumbering teen. He swings the door open roughly and then slams it shut as I fumble for my keys. I can hear Zack's thundering footsteps only a few feet away as I finally turn my key in the ignition and start moving. Frank cheers out the window, sticking up both of his middle fingers at his former teammate, practically begging for a beating. I hear Zack screaming every profanity I know as I drive out of the parking lot and out onto the main road of our small town.

"Fuck, that was awesome, Dan!" He reaches over and puts his hand on the back of my head and my farthest cheek from him before placing an aggressive kiss on my cheek. I laugh at him and shove him off of me, making it so I can actually focus on the road and turn onto the highway without crashing into the curb.

"You do realize that Zack's probably gonna kill me tomorrow during practice, right?" I comment while laying on the accelerator, preparing to enter the lane of speeding vehicles. He sighs, letting out a laugh at the end.

"No he won't Coach would throw a fit if anyone hit you, you're the new captain." He chokes slightly on the last word but I decide not to mention it.

"Yeah I guess."

We sit in a comfortable quiet for a few minutes as Frank tries to find an actually appealing radio station. He finally finds some Fall Out Boy on a punk rock station and turns it up as I turn off the highway, signaling at the last moment. I start to drive on a long narrow road and eventually see the glowing sign of George's Brick Oven Pizza and smile. Frank sings along to My Songs Know What You Did In The Dark under his breath.

I go a little farther and then turn into the large dirt parking lot for the restaurant and park in the closest spot to the place, two rows away. There are probably twenty five other cars surrounding us which makes sense considering how it's a live music night. I look over to see Frank with his eyes closed, still mouthing the words to the bridge of the song. I sit and watch his lips move, watch as they lightly touch and his tongue peeks out of his mouth. His beauty is astounding.

Patrick Stump sings the last notes of the song and Frank opens his hazel eyes slowly. I look away and pull the key out of the ignition as he yawns quietly, his shirt riding up a bit to show his stomach as it always does. He drops his arms and opens the car door. I open mine and step out into the cold, hugging my letterman jacket tightly against my torso. I had forgotten my leather jacket in my bedroom this morning so I had to just take this purple one out of my sports bag, it's so cold and basically useless, why do people think it's cool to wear it everywhere?

I walk to the small building with the large neon light sign hung above two glass doors. They're both covered in posters advertising the different bands that play there every Friday and Saturday. Frank opens the door and holds it for me, following close behind. I stop and look at the calendar on the wall to see that that a local band with the lead singer Brandon (or maybe it's Brendon, I can't tell) will be playing. My friend walks through another set of glass doors and starts to talk to a girl probably a year or two older than us in a black t-shirt and pants, long brown hair spilling over her shoulders in loose curls. I see her laugh and pick up two menus as I go through the same doors as Frank and then starts to walk through the small restaurant to bring us to our table.

I smile and sit down at a booth in the back of the restaurant across from Frank and look around at the dive. George's is a hidden treasure. A hidden pizza treasure that you most likely would never go near if not for someone recommending it to you. I mean there are different styled chandeliers hanging from the low ceiling that I actually have to duck under in the dining area so I don't have to hit my head. All the tables are made of either wood or metal and are scattered across the middle of the maybe fifty foot square room with mismatched chairs tucked under them, some stools, others folding metal chairs, there are even some old ornate wood chairs at a couple of the tables. The booths are lining the walls and all have hard green booths with a long wooden table to eat at. In the front corner of the place next to the doors there's a performance area where the band is now hanging up a homemade sign that I think says Panic! At the Disco but I'm not quite sure because of how messy the handwriting is. Across from the dining area is the open kitchen where all the chefs are sliding pizzas into brick ovens, creating the extremely delicious food that brings everyone in. The woman who brought us over to our booth is standing at a table in front of the short wooden wall separating the hallway where everyone comes in from the kitchen picking at her black fingernails. The smell of the baking pizzas and beer fills my nostrils in a surprisingly pleasant way.

"Would you boys like anything to drink?" I snap my head over to see a familiar face.

"Marina!"

The sixty-five year old woman smiles at me and I stand up to give her a gentle hug. I sit back down after a moment and Frank launches himself at her. Marina is Gerard's grandmother who's been working at this place for the past twenty years and before that at The Bulldog as a bartender, and a great one at that, or so I've heard.

"How are you?" I ask her and she pockets her order pad in the apron around her waist.

"I'm alright, how're you doing Daniel?" She smiles at me with her question, wiping her palms on her pants.

"I'm doing great, football's been a lot of work though lately."

"I bet it is, those training hours are really ridiculous." She turns toward Frank while adjustign her rectangular glasses so they're sat right in front of her black bun of hair. "I heard that you aren't on the team anymore, is that true or was Gerard pulling my leg?"

"No, that's right." He puts his hands on the table in front of him and gives her a small smile that I can tell that is difficult to form. "Coach asked me to leave."

"Oh honey, did he have a reason?" She places her hand on his shoulder comfortingly.

"Well it's actually because of the relationships I've been part of." I raise my eyebrows at him, surprised that he's actually telling her the truth.

"What do you mean, Frankie?"

"Coach is homophobic, Marina. He saw me with Gee."

"No!" She exclaims, raising her hand so it's covering her small mouth. "You're losing your education because of Gerard? Isn't that illegal? Firing someone because they're gay?"

"Technically yes. That doesn't mean anybody's gonna stand up for me." He sighs and then grabs her hand between both of his. "Please don't tell Gee, he just thinks that Coach wasn't satisfied with my performance. This could really hurt him if he found out. I'm not sure if he would be able to take the blow."

She retracts her hand from his and nods, smiling at him gently.

"I understand, I won't tell him. Let's get off this subject though, I'm sure you don't want to be upset tonight." She pulls her notebook out again along with a pen. "So what would you like to drink?"

"Um yeah, can I have a diet Coke?" I reply.

"And I'll take a Miller Light." Frank tells her with a smirk, making an effort to push the Samstrung situation out of his mind for the evening.

"Now are you really twenty-one?" She asks him with a poorly hidden smile while writing down the order nonetheless.

"I look it." He tells her with a smirk.

"You really don't, honey." Marina laughs and shakes her head at Frank's (hopefully mock) offense. " I'll be back with those in a moment but for now, here's your silverware." She takes out some forks and knives wrapped in napkins and hands them to us.

I thank her as she walks away and look over at Frank who's pulling the utensils out of the napkin roll. I pick up the menu and scan my eye over the pizza list, already knowing what I'm getting. Frank sets the knife and fork next to each other neatly and I roll my eyes at his neatness.

"Hey, what're you doing that for?" He asks me, hitting my elbow that I have resting on the table. "Anyway, Father Sarducci?" He glances down at the menu.

"Yeah, that works. And some buffalo wings?"

"Yup, the usual." He smiles and laughs, leaning his head against the back of the booth.

"Exactly." I fold my hands on the table. "So, Aria?"

"Oh shit, right." Frank says, laughing at me as I scowl at him. "Good fucking luck with that bitch."

"I hate you so much, do I have date her?"

"Yep, and most likely fuck her too, you know about that, right?"

"Yeah." I run my hands through my hair, my curls already starting to come back. "But dude that's my virginity we're talking about, not just another fuck."

"Oh shit, really?" He sits up straight and raises his eyebrows. "You haven't lost it yet? Oh god, I forgot. There's no way that's gonna happen with her."

"Yeah, well how else am I gonna get laid? I'm not exactly out." I look at his hands, watching him stroke the letters across his knuckles gently, the way he does whenever he's concentrating on something.

"True, but I'm gonna work on it, I promise I won't let her be your first time." He lets his hands go and taps my knuckles with his fingertips. "That can't happen."

"Alright, you two know what you're eating?" I jump at the sound of Marina's voice. Frank retracts his hands and she slides his beer over to him with a wink and then hands me my Coke. "Yeah, we'll have the usual." Frank tells her, taking a sip out of his bottle.

"Alright." She starts scribbling on her note pad. "So eight hot wings and a large Sarducci?"

I nod at her and she closes the pad and sticks the pen in her pocket.

"Great, thanks boys. Your food should be out soon, wings first, right?"

Frank nods at her this time and she walks off just as I hear the teenage boy say something into the mic up front.

"Hey guys!" He gives a small wave and I have to suppress a smile. "So we're Panic! At the Disco and we're gonna play some songs for you tonight. This is actually our first gig so I hope you like it! But anyway, I'm Brendon, on the drums is Spencer, and then these two on the guitars are Ryan and Dallon. Thanks for coming!"

I turn to Frank as they start to play the opening chords to an, I'm guessing, original song.

"Oh well imagine..." The kid sings in the background and my best friends turns his head away from the band to take another swig of his beer.

"So, how do you think you're gonna ask her out? Just do what I did and awkwardly waddle up to her in the middle of the hallway? Or are you gonna go for the more Andrew version, strutting over to her and sweeping her off her feet in the middle of practice and then giving her a rose on one knee? I personally would throw up if you did that, but it is your choice."

I laugh nervously and suck some Coke up through the red straw in my plastic glass.

"Probably just the first one, I don't really want to make a spectacle considering how I really don't want to be with her anyway." He cocks his head to the side, understanding what I mean and sets his bottle down in front of me.

"Want some?"

I pick it up and take a sip gratefully. I really do just want to clear my mind tonight, not think about being captain or school tomorrow. But of course I don't want to get drunk, I'm too afraid of what I might reveal, what I might say to Frank while he's sober, so I give him his drink back with a smile.

He tips the top in my direction and then drinks some more, closing his eyes to listen to the music.

Half an hour later all the wings have been eaten and Marina is setting down the pizza on a large metal tray between us with a smile.

"Alright, enjoy boys. Would you like a water, Frankie?" She asks him, pointing at his empty bottle.

"Uh, can I have another beer?" He hands her the glass bottle and she raises one eyebrow at him.

"No way, that's too much underage drinking in one night. I'm gonna go grab you a water. Enjoy the Sarducci, boys!" She walks away as I laugh at Frank's exasperated face.

"I'll get her one day." He picks a piece of pizza up, the sun-dried tomatoes, eggplant, artichoke hearts, and gorgonzola shining in the light above us. I take two and place them on the blue china plate in front of me, my mouth watering as I shake parmesan cheese all over it. Frank bites into his slice and moans contently before dropping it back down on his plate as Marina comes back with his water.

"Thanks." He says, pizza still in his mouth. She smacks him lightly.

"Don't talk with your mouth full, Frankie. How have you not learned to close it, isn't that one of Gerard's biggest pet peeves?" She jokes.

"Yep." He says, still chewing. "That's why I'm doing it now, I'm free!" He throws his arms up and she laughs at him before walking over to the table a few feet away from us, talking to a middle aged lady with three small children hopping around in their chairs and laughing. I smile at the smallest girl when she lifts up her heavy head and stares at me. She laughs and opens her fist to wave at me, shaking her long brown curls around happily. I wave back at her and then give her one last smile before returning to my pizza.

I feel Frank's eyes on me and I look up to see him shaking his head at me with a small smile.

"You'll make a pretty great dad one day, Dan. Your kids will be so lucky." I blush as he takes another bite of his pizza and sip at my drink until I hear the unsatisfying sound of having nothing left.

We spend the next ten minutes eating our food and listening to the teenage boys who are now near the end of their set. They're actually quite good, singing songs that I'm shocked they know all the advanced vocabulary for. I think I might come back when they play again, or at least I hope George will bring them back. Maybe I'll have to tell Marina that I think they should keep them as a regular act, I don't think I could ever play the songs they've written.

"Alright, you ready?" Frank asks me after Marina comes back with his debit card. I nod and he pulls his black leather jacket on over his ripped t-shirt; Gerard's favorite on him. "Then let's go."

I slide out of the booth and start across the floor to give a goodbye hug to Marina, telling her to say hello to her husband for me and put in a good word to George about Panic! At the Disco. While Frank bids her farewell I go over to the band in the corner and drop a five dollar bill in the black top hat they have set out. The lead singer looks over at me with a smile and I give him a thumbs up.

"You're very talented, keep up the good work." I tell him and then turn to head out the door when he taps me on the shoulder.

"Thanks, which one was your favorite?" He asks in a surprisingly high voice.

"Probably the main sex one."

"Oh thanks, that one was my favorite to write. It's called Lying Is the Most Fun a Girl Can Have Without Taking Her Clothes Off." he states with a wide grin.

I laugh and say goodbye to him as his band mates sort through the tips people left.

I see Frank standing next to the Jeep bouncing around on his toes to keep warm as I step out of the building in my Letterman jacket again and unlock the car from the doorway. He hops in quickly and I dash across the parking lot, trying not to get hit by a Camry on the way. By the time I'm buckled into the car Frank is sat in the passenger seat warming his hands over the heater on the dashboard. 

"Home?" I ask him.

"Home."

He turns the radio back on as we pull out of the parking lot, blasting For The Lost and The Brave.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys thanks for reading! These are actually the edited chapters only that I've been posting, I have eleven chapters written and posted on Wattpad but I've been going through and editing before writing another. So if you want you can go check those out on there but I will be trying to finish all my editing for the fifteenth!
> 
> Comment and shit if you liked it, bye!
> 
> -Bails xx


	3. Maybe Drinking Doesn't Help

Neither of us talk on the way to Frank and Gerard's apartment, just hum along to the music coming out of my old car radio. Their apartment is maybe five miles away from the restaurant so it doesn't take very long to drive there on the highway but Frank still seems antsy to get home to Gerard. He's always been a worrier but quite honestly his boyfriend has made this anxiety worse with the state that he tends to be in, both physically and mentally. We've found him passed out on the floor or dumping bloody paper towels in the trash when getting back, those incidents have clearly affected Frank's mental state when he knows his boyfriend is home alone. Sometimes it seems less like Frank is Gerard's boyfriend but rather his caretaker.

I pull into the parking lot for Maple View Apartment Complex and park the Jeep in the spot next to Gerard's truck. Frank unlatches his seat belt and then reaches back to the back seats to pick up my duffle bag and backpack.

"Why are you grabbing my stuff?" I ask him and he looks over at me once he's hauled the bags into his lap.

"Because you're staying the night. I know you don't like driving in the country at night." He throws the duffle over into my lap and I groan as it hits me hard. Frank laughs at me and swings his door open as I pull the keys out of the ignition.

"Hey, catch!" I tell him and throw the key ring at him. He catches it and puts it in the front pocket of my brown backpack. Frank starts to walk around the back of the car and I jump out of my open door, slam it shut and follow him to the entrance of the first brick building. He swings my backpack on and carries his with his left hand while opening the glass door for me.

"Why thank you, sir." I say in an exaggerated British accent as I enter the two-story building.

"You're very welcome." He says back to me in an equally terrible accent and I break out into uncontrollable giggles with him. I scale the set of concrete stairs and walk all the way down the hallway past three other doors on either side of me. Frank comes in front of me and pulls out his key and unlocks the dark green door.

"Alright, come on in." He says as he opens the door and pulls the copper key out. I walk in after him and throw my bag down next to the pile of shoes to the right of the door. He drops the backpacks next to the sports bag and slips his converse off, kicking them next to the shoe pile. I throw my black sneakers next to his and walk out of the main hall and into the lounge.

"Hey babe, where are you?" Frank yells while dropping down onto the fading black couch.

"Bedroom, I'll be out in a minute!" I hear Gerard yell from down the hall as I sit next to Frank. He picks up a small gray remote and points it toward the speaker in the corner of the room next to the small box television. The speakers start playing 27 by Fall Out Boy at an ear shattering volume.

"Shit!" Frank yells, surprised, and turns down the volume as quickly as he can. I cover my ears and look around the small room. Despite its size, there's a shit load of stuff in it. There's the television angled toward the couch in the corner, the speakers on either side of it, and a bookshelf to the right of the whole setup smack in the middle of the wall. The shelf is completely filled with any kind of book you could think of; comic books, poetry collections, murder mysteries, biographies, cookbooks, Song Writing for Dummies, they're all there stuffed into the overflowing set of shelves. Then of course to the right of the bookshelves is Frank's guitar Pansy and an electric keyboard that I practice on and help teach Gerard to play whenever I'm over. On the right wall there are dozens of pictures hanging in picture frames or just pinned up. All pictures of Frank and Gerard together or with their friends and family. I'm actually in several of the pictures; standing in both of their arms on my 17th birthday, fake gagging as the couple is making out against a tree, scoring the winning touchdown at last year's High School Bowl finals. I'm the most featured person on that wall besides them. The back of the room is completely filled with the couch that Frank and I are sitting on, stains littered across it from beer, cigarette smoke, and well, let's say they don't always make it to the bedroom when they're in the mood. There's a tall black lamp next to me on a wooden stand that I turn on as a shirtless Gerard walks in through the doorway.

"Hey, you never told me Dan's staying over." He says before bending over and pecking Frank's lips. I can't tell whether my presence is wanted or not from his tone of voice so I watch him closely as he stretches out in front of his boyfriend, the small amount of fat on his stomach spreading out and showing the bumps of his ribs.

"Yeah, but I figured he might as well. It's kinda late and he doesn't like driving at night." Frank explains as his boyfriend sits down in his lap. I roll my eyes as he wraps his arms around Gerard.

"Okay, cool. You guys ate, right?"

"Yeah, we saw Marina too." I tell him and kick his foot as I move so my back is leaning against the arm of the couch and my body is spread so my feet are touching Frank's thigh. Gerard looks at me oddly when I he spots my toes touching my friend and I straighten up a bit to make sure we're not touching and only then does he stop staring at me.

"Damn, I haven't seen her in forever. We've only emailed and that doesn't exactly happen regularly."

I nod at him and then take my phone out of my pocket when I hear it ding.

Mom:

Where are you?

I sigh and text her back, telling her that I'm staying the night at Frank's apartment. She has no idea that Frank's living with Gerard at all, or even that they're dating seeing how they wanted to keep their relationship in the shadows and my mother is one of the biggest gossips in the county.

"Who's that? Your newest boyfriend, Danny?" Frank mocks me. I kick his knee and wrinkle my nose at him, consciously making an effort not to look at Gerard even though I can feel his eyes burning through my skull. 

"Shut up, you know I've never had one. And besides, it was my mom. She wanted to know where I am."

"I see." He says and I put my phone away. "So you got homework to do?"

"Well I never finished that English thing but I think I'll just do that tomorrow 'cause I'll just be bored at home and not here."

"That works, you got any, Gee?" Frank brushes his nose against Gerard's shoulder.

"Nah, I haven't really had much to do in my classes since my teachers kinda suck at their jobs. The only course I actually to stuff in is art and we don't bring any of the work home. Senior year is treating me well." He smiles and turns his body so his back isn't to Frank but is instead sideways on his boyfriend's lap and places his head on his shoulder, his bright hair brushing Frank's neck.

"And treating me terribly." I mumble.

"Alright well you guys might have eaten but I'm starving." Gerard suddenly announces and gets off my friend's lap. Frank shifts so he's sitting on his legs and closer to me. I bend my knees so my feet aren't so close to him but then he moves even closer to me and picks my feet up and places them in his lap, resting his hands on top of them. I look at him and he smiles at me. I smile back at him and lean my head against the back of the sofa. He looks at me for a moment longer but then tears his eyes away and looks over at Gerard who's just standing in the doorway staring at his boyfriend with narrowed eyes.

"Do you want anything, Frank?" He asks and I hear my best friend gulp before shaking his head no. Gerard nods and walks out of the room, Frank following him with his eyes.

"Shit." He rubs his head with both of his hands. "He called me Frank. He's mad."

I sit up, taking my feet out of his lap and shift over so I'm next to him. He looks at me and sighs.

"I'm gonna go ask him what's up, be back in a minute." He says while getting up, pushing his arms against my shoulder and the back of the seat.

"Good luck."

He walks out of the room, shaking his arms against his sides to get rid of his nerves. I lie down on the couch and listen for any part of the conversation I can hear but they're almost silent while speaking. They've learned to be, not wanting anyone to catch anything that they could possibly say to each other that would reveal their relationship.

I close my eyes and breathe deeply. I never seem to have time to relax with my schedule; school, practice, homework, housework, repeat. It feels so good to just breathe, in out, in out, in out. I smile and put my arms over my head, hanging off the arm of the piece of furniture. I continue my deep breathing until I suddenly hear a shout from the kitchen where the couple must be.

"You were giving him fucking heart eyes!" I hear Gerard screech and my eyes get larger.

Shit.

"What the fuck are you talking about? He's my best friend, nothing more!" Frank screams and I sit up, my hands ready to push myself up off the couch.

"Really, Frank? Is he? Or are you going to cheat on me, we both know he's gay! We both know he'd go for you!" Gerard yells again and I stand to start quietly walking over to the kitchen to make sure neither of them get violent. I hear them yell at each other more ferociously as I pad out of the room and into the doorway of the kitchen.

"Gee, I love you, not him!" Frank screams and then turns his head away from a seething Gerard who's pressed him against the hard kitchen counter. Gerard's eyes follow his and he spots me just inside the doorway.

"Go on, Frank, he's here to save you." He pushes Frank out from in front of him and into my arms. I try not to touch him but he slams into my chest and I have to grab his arms so he doesn't fall over. I look up at Gerard once I drop my hands and shake my head at him. Frank refuses to look away from my t shirt, his neck bent down.

"Get out! Just leave, and take him with you!" The red haired man screams at me, his arms swinging wildly, finger pointing toward the entrance to the apartment.

"Let's go, Frank. Come on." I look down and whisper to him. "Just grab your stuff for tomorrow, you can't stay here tonight, I won't let you be alone with him right now."

He looks up at me and nods with large eyes before walking around me and out of the kitchen.

"Take your fucking medication. We'll see you tomorrow morning." I tell him with a straight face and then leave the kitchen.

~~~~~

"I can't believe him. I just can't believe he would actually say that!" Frank yells as we speed down the highway. He takes a sip from the beer he grabbed on the way out of his apartment. "I love him, how could he think I don't?"

I look over at him sadly as he wails, banging his hands against the dashboard of the car.

"I'm sorry, Frank. I'm really sorry." I return my eyes to the road and signal that I'm exiting the road.

"No, wait." He says, tears and saliva running down his chin. "We aren't going to your place are we?"

"Well yeah." I tell him.

"No, I can't go to your house right now. No, we need to go to a bar. I don't wanna remember any of this tomorrow." He begs me, his hazel eyes boring into the side of my head.

"But we have school tomorrow, you'll be too hung over. And we already went drinking yesterday-"

"Dan, please. I need this. Can you please just do this for me? Just this one time. Please." He chokes out in between sobs. It's obvious that he's already tipsy and his fight with Gerard has only made his condition worse. I look over at him and see his pink face and swollen eyes, immediately knowing that my mother would seriously question him and most likely tell everyone about his meltdown.

"Okay fine, just this once." I give in and switch off my turn signal. "Where're we going?"

"The Library." He says quietly. I shake my head, already regretting my decision to say yes to him.

"Okay."

The Library is a bar half a mile outside of the local community college. The place is very popular among the college students what with all the beer and twenty-four seven DJ. The bar is owned by a thirty year old man who had gone to the school he chose to settle near back when he was nineteen. He had been taken out of the school by his parents after he was never able to come up with a good excuse as to where he was when he was out drinking. Whenever they called he would be with his buddies gulping down a beer or snorting crack and they would always give him away without meaning to. So he built his bar and called it The Library, a perfect name considering all the underage drinkers who went there, if anyone asked, they could just say they went to the library. The president of the college had found him in his prior location last year and got him removed but just two months ago he reopened in a formally abandoned building, now repainted and decorated on the inside, but the outside still looks like an old run down building, the perfect disguise.

Going to The Library takes a lot of odd turns; an illegal u-turn here, a sharp left cut across the road there. It's really stressful, so I'm very glad that while I'm clutching the steering wheel with white knuckles Frank calms down to only quietly whimpering and wiping his nose on his shirt sleeve every few minutes. I'm still worried about him though, he's had two beers tonight already and now we're going to a bar filled with college students, people we're younger than and I'm quite frankly terrified of. I glance over at him to check his condition more than probably needed, but he's my best friend and I want to make sure he's alright, well alright except for his already slightly intoxicated state. He seems to still be alright as I pull into the hidden parking lot of The Library behind the shabby brown building.

"You ready, Frank?" I ask him, placing my hand on his knee after pulling the keys out of the ignition. He looks up with red-rimmed eyes and gives me a crooked smile.

"Yeah, let's go, Danny."

I sigh and give him a pitiful attempt at a smile. He hops out of the car and starts up to the old building, me following close behind. I hug my letterman jacket close to myself and shiver as we reach the entrance.

Frank stops at the black metal door and knocks on it, waiting for a security guard to open it for us. He looks back at me and smiles brightly, reaching out for my arm. I run up and reach out my hand for him to latch onto. He does, rubbing his thumb across the back of my hand and making the butterflies rage in my stomach.

"Hey. Wait, Frank, is that you?" I hear from in front of me and look up to see a tall man with cropped black hair and a goatee smiling down at my friend.

"Hey, Reggie!" Frank says happily, bringing his hand up that isn't holding mine to give the man a fist bump. "Long time no see!"

"Yeah, why're you here? Don't you have school and shit tomorrow?" Reggie furrows his eyebrows at the small teenager.

"Yeah but I just need to get drunk tonight, Gerard got a little out of control," He chokes when he says his boyfriend's name slightly but Reggie either doesn't notice or decides not to comment on it. "And really this is all that can help I think."

"Okay kid," He slaps a hand on Frank's back. "But be safe."

"Aw I will, don't worry." He starts through the door, Reggie moving back and against the wall behind him. "Come on, Dan."

Before I know it I'm in a smoky room filled with people who must all be at least two years older than me and I'm holding Frank's hand as tightly as I can. He looks back at me and squeezes my hand in his.

"It's fine, Danny! You're okay!" He yells over the loud techno music being blasted through the large amps in every corner and on every wall. He pulls me farther into the crowd of jumping and sweating people toward a long bar on the other side of the room. The bodies around me don't even seem like separate life forms, more like one large glob of screaming humanity. I resist the urge to take my hand out of Frank's and cover my ears until we're out of the crowd and are standing side by side in and behind completely wasted man asking for another shot of vodka.

"Jackson, you've already had seven!" The barista yells to him with her high pitched voice as we walk to the other end of the counter to a man tapping a pencil against a thick textbook.

"Hey." Frank says, making him look up from the page he's reading and close the book. He gives him a smile and then looks over at me, his pupils immediately growing larger. I back up and grip Frank's hand even more tightly which I'm surprised is even possible at this point. "Two of your strongest beers." He puts up two fingers as I hide behind him as much as I can which is a bit difficult considering how I'm almost a foot taller than him.

"Okay, the strongest ones we have coming up." The tall bartender turns around and bends over, his shirt riding up to show some of his tanned back. I look away after a moment and then gulp, burying my face in the back of Frank's neck.

"Are you okay, Danny?" He asks as he turns around and I rest my head on top of his. He starts to pull my neck back gently and I look down at him. He's giving me a sympathetic smile. "Why don't you go grab us a seat?"

"Okay." I nod at him and he gets on his tiptoes to kiss my cheek. I feel myself blush and then rush off with my head down but not before seeing the now irritated bartender glaring at Frank. I laugh quietly before finding a couch that surprisingly no one is making out and sit down, waiting for my friend to join me on the stained sofa.

He does a moment later, giving me my drink as he sits down almost on top of me he's so close. I can feel him breathing down my neck as I take steady sips and listen to the music, it's actually quite comforting knowing that he's here with me. I reach over and push my fingers through is. I look over at him and he smiles at me before pressing another kiss to my cheek, this time a little closer to my lips. I start blushing again and turn my head to look at the mass of dancing people.

"Hey, Frank?" I say, moving my head a bit to knock against the top of his. 

"Yeah?" He takes another sip out of the already half empty glass bottle in his hand.

"Do you think the reason Gerard got upset was because he didn't take his medication? That he wouldn't do that normally." I ask him, worried that this type of incident could possibly happen again, or that this was a repeat of another day. 

"Yeah probably, I mean we've had arguments about you before and he's never gotten violent before." I look down at him with wide eyes, how long have I been causing problems in their relationship?

"Really? How long have I been an issue in your relationship?" I lift the drink up to my mouth and swallow a gulp, wincing at the burning sensation in my throat despite it not being nearly as strong as the vodka that I took shots of yesterday.

"A little while I guess, he's always saying how I look at you all lovey and we're too touchy to just be friends. We normally end up fucking after those; he wants me to show I'm his or something. But that's obviously not happening tonight." He shrugs his shoulders as I cough. I'm surprised that Gerard still has issues with our friendship even after all the times I've told him I'll never make a move on Frank and that we've always acted this way, that we're practically family. He is quite paranoid, but I thought that he had finally started trusting me...

"I'm sorry, Frankie. I tried to tell him about us, should I just stay away for a bi-"

"No no no no no, don't do that, Dan. Don't even say that." Frank interrupts, setting his bottle down on the floor next to the couch and taking my cheeks in both of his cupped hands. "I've told him as well, he just has a hard time with it."

"Which is why I should stay aw-"

"Nope." He cuts me off once again, pressing his index finger against my scrunched lips. "That means he just has to learn to fucking deal with it, I'm not abandoning you for him ever." 

"Thanks, Frank." I say quietly after he takes his hands away from my face with a smile.

"Hey don't mention it. It's just bros before hoes."

"But Gerard's also a bro." I giggle.

"We both know that he's much more of a hoe than a bro, Danny."

I laugh as Frank sits up and moves so he's not leaning against the sides of my legs but the back of the couch, draining the last of his alcohol. He sets it down beside him and then leans into my side, breathing his beer breath down the side of my neck. I take a few more sips of my drink at he lays his head down on my shoulder.

"I want another beer."

~~~~~

Three hours later Frank has drank five more bottles and me only two but it really doesn't take much to for me to get tipsy. We're standing in the doorway of a long dark hallway that I've been seeing countless people go down over the course of the evening. I've only ever been here once before and it was to rescue Gerard from a bad drug deal with some guy in one of the rooms lining the hall. Frank had brought me all the way through the building sprinting though so I really have no idea where everything is or what anything is and now that the beer is down my throat and clouding my mind I doubt I would be any help in knowing how to leave the building if I lived here.

"Hey, Danny boy!" Frank yells, hanging of my shoulder and making me teeter back and forth on my heels.

"Woah." I slur and start to flail my arms around to find something to hold myself up against. After a moment my palm presses against a cool surface behind me and Frank's arms are looped around my neck. "I've got us."

The room is spinning slightly and I feel like I might still topple over even with what's probably a wall behind me holding me up. My head is buzzing with happy energy and I can't keep the large smile off my face, saliva trailing down from the corner of my lips. My hair is stuck to my sweaty skin and I can feel Frank's arms sliding around against my neck, both of our sweat making our skin slippery in some places but sticky in other where his skin rubs painfully against mine.

"Hey, Danny." Frank says into my ear, spit flying out of his mouth that's practically inside the shell of my ear. "Let's come back here."

"Huh?" I grunt but am then pulled by the neck and one arm around my waist into the hallway where he then releases me and grabs my hands quickly. I wrap my fingers around his pale hands and smile, his skin always feel so wonderful against my own.

"Let's go in here." Frank sloppily points toward a door to my right and pulls me to it. I stumble and fall against his back, giggling as he twists the doorknob. He swings the door open and walks in quickly, me following his lead with my hand still in his. He stops walking once he's at the base of two brown mattresses pushed together in the middle of the room.

"Alright, sit." He drops my hand and pushes me down onto the right one lazily. He then stumbles back over to the doorway and pushes the door back closed, sliding down it once he presses in the lock. He holds his head in his hands; something I vaguely remember means that he must be really drunk. I think so at least, his head hurts or something. I let my head loll to one side and stare at him as he crawls over to me.

He jumps up onto the mattress next to me and sets his hand on my thigh. He starts to massage the spot and looks at me with blown pupils.

"So Danny, how're you feeling?" He slurs and I smile despite myself. He places a kiss on the corner of my mouth and giggles. He brings his other hand up and pushes it into my leg next his other one. He uses his power to move his body and sit in my lap, one leg on either side of me. He places his hands on my hips and starts to kiss down my jaw line. "Do you like this?"

I moan softly and nod. He trails his hands down my sides and then presses them against my chest, pushing me down so I'm laying on the mattress and he's on top of me straddling my hips.

"Good." He plants his lips on mine and moves them against them slowly, licking the inside of my lips until his tongue enters my mouth and I'm holding onto his jaw with a loose grip.

I'm barely thinking at all at this point, just feeling his sweet lips kissing mine in the way that I've dreamed of for years. But I have this nagging feeling in the back of my head that I need to know the reason for or I could possibly go mad. Frank lies down softly on my stomach and plays with the collar of my shirt as I think. I use my entire muddled mind to figure out what's so wrong in this moment. In this wonderful moment that I don't think anyone would ever protest being a part of. I can't think of anything for many moments, only images of the porn searches I've made for "emo teenager tattooed" and all the times I've jerked off to pictures of Frank.

But then I hit the jackpot.

Frank has a boyfriend.

And it isn't me.

I open my eyes widely and try to make my mind work, be able to focus on one thing and have it not be how hard my nipples are or how my tongue thirsts for his sliding against it. Frank sits back up on my hips and peels his t-shirt off quickly, exposing his pale chest in all its beauty. I swallow as he takes my hands and runs my palms down his front slowly. I sigh once he takes them off and hooks my hands behind his neck, pulling me up so I'm just sat on the mattress again and he's in my lap. His nose brushes against mine as we stare into each other's eyes, his full of lust and mine indecisiveness.

He reaches for the bottom hem of my shirt and starts to inch it up over my head but I reach down and grab his hands.

"Frank, your-your boyfriend." I stutter out, looking at his face, hoping for some sign of recognition.

"Who?" He leans forward and kisses the right corner of my lips and I gulp, using all my willpower to not just let him take my body without any questions.

"Ge-Gerard." I say, not quite sure if that's the man's name but use it nonetheless. "Gerard, you don't wanna hurt him."

"No Gerard." He slurs and unclasps my hands from him, allowing my shirt to come off over my head. "Just you. I love you."

"No." I gasp and push him back with my palms on his chest. "No, you love your boyfriend. I'm not your boyfriend."

"Danny, I don't care, I love you!" He yells and stands up on the floor in front of me. His chest heaves and his hair is all over the place in a way that makes him look utterly breathtaking. His ripped blue jeans hand low on his waist and he catches me staring at them and works his fingers to undo the button.

"No Frank, this isn't what you want. Stop." I say quickly, standing up.

"Yes it is."

I open my mouth to protest but once his pants are gone, so are my morals.


	4. I'm So Dirty, Babe

I wake up slowly and sorely. My eyes open groggily and I blink a few times to get myself used to the dim lights in the unfamiliar room I'm lying in. My head hurts like hell and I can feel something pressed into my side but I have no idea what it is and frankly I'm not really sure I want to find out. All I really know at the moment is that I'm not home and I'm fucking freezing.

"Ugh." I groan and pull at the blanket that's draped lazily across my hips. It doesn't budge and I pull harder on it only to be greeted with another groan, this one from someone else.

My eyes widen and I slowly let go of the raggedy blanket. My heart races as I move my hands so I can push myself up. I slowly press my palms down on the bed and turn so I can see what or really who the hell is next to me.

I let out a sigh of relief when I see that it's only Frank and not some odd person I don't know at all. I've woken up with a stranger before which was one of the weirdest (and thankfully not most sexual) experiences ever, I'm glad this time it's only Frank. I start to lower myself and lie down, not wanting to be up at all.

But before I can really let myself relax and fall asleep again I realize something.

We're both completely naked.

My boxers are in the corner of the room.

And there's cum on my chest.

"Oh my god." I whisper and cover my hand with my mouth. "We-we-"

But I'm suddenly cut off by another groan from Frank. I look over at him with now tear-filled eyes as he stirs and moves so his head is resting on his pale arm.

I wipe the tears from my eyes and quickly shift myself off of the filthy mattresses. Frank doesn't move at all, he's always been a pretty heavy sleeper. I stand up and stare at his sleeping form, still in denial that neither of us are wearing clothes and how we very obviously had sex last night. My head starts to pound painfully and I hiss in pain, pressing my palm to my forehead.

We had been drunk; I know that much due to the aching pain I'm in and not just in my ass. I taste the beer in my mouth as well my mouth feels disgusting. So that means we were under the influence and Frank probably doesn't even remember last night given how he always drinks more than me and I can't even remember last night's events. That means that maybe I can make it look like we just slept in the same bed, not together.

I move as quickly as I can to walk across the room where I saw my black Calvin Klein boxers lying in a heap. I pull them on and then go to grab my red t shirt. I figure that I don't really need my jeans considering I would never sleep in them anyway but now I have the issue of finding Frank's clothes and slipping them on his body without waking him up which would normally be an impossible task if it weren't Frank. I once took him out of his bed and hung him from the clothesline outside before he woke up.

I approach him and slowly pull the blanket off of his naked hips, letting it drag across his pale skin delicately. I sigh as his body is completely exposed; he's so beautiful, even more than normal because of our activities last night. His black hair is messy, sticking to his forehead. His cheeks are rosy and there's a jack-o-lantern on the small of his back that he must have gotten recently as I don't recognize it. His skin is a wonderful milky white that contrasts the dingy brown of the old mattresses in a way that is practically indescribable. I can't believe how beautiful he is. And how much I wish he were mine.

I snap out of my daze after a moment of just watching his easy breathing and look around me to find his boxers. I find them flung in the corner of the small room and roll my eyes; I always figured Frank would be dramatic during sex but wow.

I pick them up and then grab his shirt from beside them to throw on the bed near his head. I walk over slowly as my skull feels like it's caving in and grab the clothes, breathing out through my mouth heavily. I can't believe that he actually did it; he actually seduced me into letting him cheat on Gerard.

I place my hands on his hip and tilt him over so he's laying on his back and then push the one pillow on the bed so it's supporting his back. I lift his right leg and pull his blue starred boxers over his right foot and then over his left while picking up his other leg. He doesn't seem to be bothered at all by this so I let my mind wander a bit, trying to bring up any memories from last night. I can't seem to remember anything after watching Frank finish his fourth beer of the night and it's disturbing, I don't think I've ever been that drunk, so much that I don't remember most of the night.

I now have his underwear up to his butt and his dick is slightly tucked into it so I just pray to every god I can think of as I quickly pull them up so they're on him and then crouch down in case he does wake up and decides to punch the person who just snapped an elastic waistband around his waist.

I slowly get up once I feel confident that he isn't going to suddenly jolt awake. I peek over at him as I grab his t shirt from behind his lolled head quickly. All I see is his chest moving up and down thankfully, I can't imagine how much he would flip out if he found out that he'd came onto me last night.

I walk over so I'm standing next to the bed and look down at him as I turn his shirt back out so that the obscure band logo is showing on the front. I stop though once I realize one very important thing.

He took my virginity last night. He took my virginity and I don't even remember it. I cover my mouth with his t shirt in my hand as tears well up in my eyes again. I had my first fucking time last night with my shit faced best friend who both has a boyfriend and can't know any of this even occurred.

Well at least if the guys force me into fucking the cheerleader who I'm supposed to ask out today, which obviously won't be happening, she won't be taking my virginity from me. I mean I don't want to have sex with her at all, but if they make me she won't be the face that I think of whenever people ask me about my first time. But then again I won't really be able to picture any face when I'm asked about it given I don't remember a fucking second of the night.

I hear Frank snore and widen my eyes to look down at him. He squirms and then sits up, rubbing his eyes groggily. I panic and start to flail my arms around silently, trying to figure out what I should do, me just standing in my boxers and a t shirt holding his. He starts to turn his head so he's facing me and I immediately chuck his band shirt to the other side of the room and ruffle my hair to look like I just woke up.

Frank turns his head all the way and squints up at me with bloodshot eyes. He scratches his chest with his bitten down nails and yawns silently.

"Dan?" He asks tiredly.

"Yeah, Frank?" I sit down next to him on the bed and he just stares at me. I guess his hangover is going to be really bad today, he's having a hard time just concentrating on my face and it's barely three feet away.

"Oh good. Where are we?" He reaches out and grabs my shoulder. He looks at me with hair across my face and it takes all my power to not reach over and fix it for him.

"At the bar from last night. You got really shit faced so I brought you in here and we just slept on the mattresses." I tell him, trying not to give away how truly difficult it is to be lying to him about something this important. But ignorance really is bliss for him right now, he would never be able to keep this from Gerard and then they would break up and it would just be a huge mess all because of me.

"Okay, why am I only wearing boxers?" He furrows his eyebrows but then hisses as it pains his head and rubs his temples with his slender fingers.

"Oh," I gulp. "You said that that was how you wanted to sleep so I let you."

"Wait, was I sleeping with you with only underwear?" He closes his eyes but tilts his head up so he would be looking straight at me if they were open.

"Yeah, it's no big deal though really."

"Yeah just sorry, Dan. I normally only sleep in just boxers when I'm with Gee. I don't know why I did that."

"Oh if only the boxers were the issue here." I think.

"It's seriously all fine, Frank. We were both pretty drunk, I really only noticed how you weren't wearing a shirt or anything just now." I reassure him and hope to god he buys it and can't smell the cum stuck to my chest that's starting to get to me a bit.

"Okay, well lets get out of here and back to my place, I don't wanna lay on these prostitute sheets anymore." He says and shudders while struggling to stand up. I laugh and then get up to help him. I stand in front of him and take his hands in mine, pulling him up on his feet easily. He falls forward so his ear is pressed against my chest and I take in a sharp breath and put one around his waist and then start to walk him over to a chair in the corner of the room. I spot a pair of handcuffs next to it that I know the exact purpose for and shudder before setting Frank on the dirty piece of furniture.

"Alright, I'll grab your clothes, you put them on." I've already done enough clothing you for today I think while walking around and retrieving his shirt, pants, jacket, socks, and sneakers.

"Thanks, Dan." He slowly starts to put on his clothes and I pull my pants up as he does so. I grab my phone out of my pocket to check the time as he buckles his belt.

The screen turns on brightly and I immediately lower the brightness so I can see that it's already eleven in the morning.

"Well I guess we missed French." I laugh and Frank pulls on his first shoe, grunting like an idiot. "Here, I'm gonna speed up this process a little."

I crouch down and shove his feet in his shoes as he pulls his jacket on. I tie them and he smiles down at me gratefully.

"Thanks, Danny."

"You're welcome," I pull the loops through and drop my hands to my knees. "All done, let's go."

I get up and reach out my hand to help him up and he grabs it.

"Thank you for keeping me out of trouble, Dan. I know I can be an issue when I'm drunk."

I gulp and force a smile onto my face.

"Of course, Frankie. I'll always be here for you.

~~~~~

"Okay, Gerard will be home in about four hours, you need to look sober and happy and not like we've been within even fifteen feet of each other." I tell him once we're inside his apartment and sat on the couch.

"Yeah," He laughs. "The sober part will be harder than the rest but we can work on that, right? I mean it's just a hangover even if it's a fucking killer one." He reaches up and rubs his temples again.

"Yeah, I mean I feel dead and I only had a few beers, you practically chugged 'em down." I tell him, laughing slightly at his stupidity slightly his pain. He groans and just leans over so his head is resting on my shoulder. I reach up and softly smooth his hair down on his head the way he likes it. "But once the Asprin kicks in you should be able to walk around and maybe straighten up this place 'cause fuck, you know it's a mess in here." I motion to the piles of random shit littered across the living room. I can only imagine what the rest of the apartment looks like at this point.

"Yeah I told Gee to clean the bathroom and bedroom and stuff but I kinda doubt he did it. I wonder what he did last night after we left." Frank muses and nuzzles his nose against my neck to get into a more comfortable position that doesn't make his head hurt as much.

"Well hopefully not hurt himself but that seems to be an option for him whenever he's in pain. Do you know where he keeps his blades and stuff?"

"Well there're a couple in the medicine cabinet in the bathroom but I confiscated the rest of them." Frank mumbles into my neck.

"Why not those?" I ask him, confused as to why the hell he would leave only a certain few objects for his boyfriend to damage the only body he'll ever have with.

"I wanted to see if he was still doing it and if he only had one thing to self harm with then I could just check that blade every morning and evening. I know that's stupid, I should've just taken them all away but I just- I just wanted to see." Frank tries to explain to me, looking up into my brown eyes hoping I'll understand.

"Okay, I can't say I agree with that but I get where you're coming from. I'm gonna go grab those blades, you stay here." He sits up straight and I push myself up off the couch. "I'll be back in a minute."

Frank nods and I smile at him. He nervously wrings his hands together and gives me a small smile back as I walk away. I walk into the small tiled bathroom to my right and flip the light switch. The incredibly bright light blinks on and I have to squint my eyes to look around for a moment, the brightness such a sharp contrast to the rest of the dimly lit apartment. There's a white sink in front of me and a large mirror mounted above it. To my right is the toilet and my left is the shower with a large spider symbol and "The Fabulous Killjoys" painted across the top of the shower curtain. Gerard must have made it, Frank can't paint for shit, he's more into musical art than tangible.

I open the medicine cabinet hanging to the right of the mirror and am greeted with countless pill bottles, all with Gerard Arthur Way printed on the side. He has so many pills to take every morning that I can't say I'm really surprised when he forgets one which happens every once in a while like last night when he hadn't downed the two for his bipolar disorder. I reach my hand in and start to move all the toothbrushes and toilet paper and a large box of condoms that make me feel literally sick because of who they're being used on and then finally find a small wooden box in the back corner of the top shelf.

I pull it out and rub my thumb over the smooth top of it. The wood is dark and old and the hinges holding it together squeak as I open it. I find three razor blades inside, two with dried blood on them and the other seemingly unused as I doubt Gerard would ever be able to clean them without hurting himself with them. I shut the box again and close the cabinet it came from before leaving the room.

"Okay, I'm just gonna throw these away, Frank." I yell to him while entering the kitchen and opening the trash can.

"Okay, I think I'm gonna shower and then I'll help you sort out the apartment!" I roll my eyes at him making me clean his flat and take the blades out of the wooden box. I throw them in the garbage and pocket the box, not sure if I'll be keeping it or just leave it back in my friends' bathroom.

"Okay, have fun!" I laugh and then walk past him in the hallway to the living room that he just emerged from. He slaps my ass as I walk through the doorway and snickers at my surprised face.

"I will." He winks and I turn away from the idiot that is Frank Iero.

~~~~~~

I step into the steamy shower half an hour later and let the water wash over me soothingly. I sigh and run my hands through my hair and down my neck to link together behind it. I can feel the muscles in my back loosening after all the stress that my body has been through in the past twenty-four hours.

"Oh god, what have I done?" I ask myself as I open my eyes and reach for Frank's shampoo bottle. I pop the lid and pour some of the blue gel into my hand to lather my hair with. I massage my scalp and just try to empty my mind of all my worries about last night and how Frank could possibly know and just hasn't told me yet. Or maybe he did all of this on purpose and he wanted to take my virginity. Or maybe- no.

I stop myself from drowning in my suspicions. There's no way Frank remembers anything that happened last night, he would have told me or given himself away by now with how terrible a liar he is. The thought comforts me as I start to rinse the suds out of my hair, the truth that I would definitely know if Frank was aware of his drunk activities.

But then the fact that I'm no longer a virgin comes into my mind. Because Frank took my shit-faced virginity and I'm never getting it back. Oh but of course I'm going to continue to say I'm one because he can't know about any of the things that happened between us unless I want to ruin his life and I obviously don't. But nonetheless I had my first time last night, my first ever real sexual experience and I can't remember how his fingers felt on me. I can't remember whether he meant to leave so many hickies on me that most of my chest is covered in purple bruising. I can't remember whether I made him orgasm or if he did it himself. But I think what I'm most upset about isn't the fact that I can't remember any of this but that it happened at the spur of the moment with someone who doesn't even love me. I had sex for the first time with my best friend who obviously didn't make it romantic in any way but just forced himself onto me and I'm truly trying to decide if I would classify this as rape at the moment.

I mean would it be rape? He didn't really get my consent; he just made me give in which is what a rapist does. But I've also wanted to receive his love for so long that really I must have wanted it at least a bit. But I remember trying to remind him of Gerard, I was trying to make him stop. Then maybe it would be rape. Maybe Frank did rape me.

And he'll never know.


	5. Being Tackled Has Never Sounded More Appealing

Two hours later I'm getting in my car to leave the Way and Iero apartment building where I had the pleasure of walking in on them fiercely making out for probably about the thousandth time before grabbing my coat. That's what they tend to do when they fight, just fuck and forget which I have a feeling will be problematic later in life when they're both eighty and can't fucking move quickly enough to answer the door let alone ram into each other.

I start the car and breathe out a long breath, blowing my brown fringe farther up my forehead. I wrinkle my nose and fix it quickly before backing out of the parking spot and making my way home where my mother will most likely throw a fit because knowing her, she knows that not only I wasn't at school today but anyone else in the county who decided to skip and exactly why.

One of the most convenient things about my friendship with Frank is that it's a five minute drive from his place to mine. I've used this to my advantage quite often whether in the form of running away for a time or having to get back to my house quickly and simply legging it and being able to make it home before my mother. Because it doesn't matter whose it is, she will tell every secret she can get her hands on to the women in her book club.

Yup, book club. Despite how they look in their nice frilly shirts and capri jeans, they're evil as all hell. And well since my mother Karen is the leader, you could say she's Satan. The group meets every other day to discuss the five chapters they had to read and every embarrassing moment that's occurred from Old Mr. Turner's pants falling down when he was taking out the garbage to Missy Lander burping in the middle of a school assembly. I still have no idea how they find out all this information but my theory is that they have someone in the high school feeding it out, I mean eight women can't be everywhere at once no matter how much it seems they are.

So given that description of the group, you can imagine how much I want to die when I see two Volkswagen Bugs in my driveway, a light pink one parked exactly where I normally go. I roll my eyes and decide to just park in the road and jump out of my Jeep, grabbing my bag and trying to calm down enough make it at least seem like I'm not flipping out about how they're most likely talking about me at this exact moment in the living room.

I trudge up to the red brick house, not wanting to go in at all but knowing that it's better than the alternative; listening to Frank and Gerard fucking, Fall Out Boy not quite being loud enough to drown out the moans. Once I'm at the door I sigh and knock, knowing that the women will pounce on me with questions no matter what so I might as well just give in before it ever starts.

I hear the quick clicking of heels before the lock on the door being turned and then suddenly my mother is in front of me, looking like Umbridge with all the pink she's wearing.

"Daniel!" She says haughtily, placing her manicured hand on her prominent hip. She puckers her heavily lipsticked lips slightly and raises her eyebrows at me. "Where have you been?" I sigh.

"Mom, can I at least get in the door before you start interrogating me?" I ask, exasperated already. She opens the door further and I walk through the opening, my sport bag hanging from my shoulder. I lumber over to the living room and am met with all the usual seven pairs of inquisitive eyes.

"Hello ladies." I say halfheartedly, waving to all the primped women with copies of The Help in their hands. I have no doubt that they've all already seen the movie and haven't really talked about the book at all over the past two weeks.

"Daniel." The eldest woman, Ms Enderfield says, nodding her head, gray curls bouncing across her scalp. She's always been my favorite of the group, although that doesn't quite sound like the right word at all, more like the person I hate the least.

"Ms Enderfield, how is Henry doing?"

"Oh he's just fine. He's gotten a bit fatter though, I need to put him back on the Science Diet stuff."

Ms Mayella Enderfield lost her husband last winter because of an especially terrible snow storm when he decided that it would be alright to go out to get the paper the morning after but slipped and fell, breaking his hip and damaging several of his internal organs. It had been a devastating loss to not only her but the rest of the community as well; he had been the mail man for over sixty years, started at the age of fifteen. Ever since his death she's been taking care of her cat like she did him, carefully and with extreme kindness.

"I see, yes I do hope he loses the weight. I know that putting on too many pounds can hurt small animals."

"Yes, Daniel. You've gotten so bright." She smiles at me, slowly making my view on her better. "It's a shame you hang around with that troublesome Iero child."

And she immediately loses my respect. I open my mouth to tell her just how great "that troublesome Iero child" is but my mother walks into the room and places her hand on my shoulder.

"Now Daniel, will you please tell us where you've been?" She asks in the kindest voice she can muster but there's still an icy edge to it. She pushes me over and onto the white couch next to the devil in training, the twenty one year old Regina George.

"I was with Frank." I say simply, looking around at all the women with slightly horrified faces. "Just Frank, not a serial killer ladies, don't worry." I place my duffle bag on the ground in front of me and cross my arms over my chest, looking up at my mother.

"Daniel, we've talked about this." She says, tapping the toe of her heel on the hard wood floor. "Franklin is a bad influence on you. I mean he has sex, and does drugs, and drinks, and spends time with that Way boy who all know was thrown out of his ho-"

"Stop, Mom." I interrupt her, standing up so I can look down at her petite form. "Frank, yes not Franklin is a great person. He gets straight A's not that you'd notice that, he's been completely clean for a year last month which I celebrated with him but you didn't listen when I told you that, he doesn't have sex constantly like you're convinced he does, his relationship with his mom is healthy, and did you ever think that maybe he hangs out with Gerard because he cares about him? And seriously, where did you hear that Gerard was thrown out of his hom3? That's just plain wrong oh my god. They aren't just two dimensional people, Mother. They're both really kind and just amazing people but for some reason you can't see past the tattoos Frank actually covers up for school or the pigment of Gerard's hair. Honestly Mom, just stop and think about how real everyone is. They aren't the characters that you don't ever really talk about from your books, they're real people and you should just leave them the hell alone."

I stare down at her shocked face and shake my head at her.

"I'm going up to my room, have fun discussing anything but your book, ladies!" I wave to them and irritably grab the strap of my bag, dragging it out of the room and to the stairs as quickly as I can. I hear the women immediately burst into chatter as I scale the carpeted stairs, muttering profanities under my breath.

I turn left and go up a shorter set of stairs once I reach the top and then push the door to my attic bedroom open. The slightly musky scent hits me lightly as I walk in and across a little wooden bridge over the hole in the floor that holds the furnace. There are two wooden railings along the sides of it that make sure I don't fall into it in the middle of the night or early in the morning when I'm barely awake. The room has a slanted ceiling that is the lowest on the left side and highest on the far right where my small cupboard is above my bed.

The walls are painted a mossy green and the floor is made of rough wooden planks that I every once in a while get splinters from if I forget to put of slippers or keep my shoes on. The ceiling was originally a dingy white but is now covered in a huge mural that Gerard painted for me when he first moved here. About a week into him living in this town Frank and I invited him to hang out with us and right once he saw my bare ceiling he asked if he could paint on it. It took him about two months but it was all worth it once I saw the finished product.

The background is black with different splashes of colors like sunrises and sunsets or a clear blue April sky. In the black area there are thin silver lines creating ones and zeros all in neat lines, the pattern that's created whenever I film a video or watch someone else's. The delicate lines are captivating to look at, especially when I'm lying in bed late at night and can't get to sleep. But the most beautiful parts of the mural would be the silver painted band logos and music notes that look like they're bursting out of the sky areas. There are countless rhythms that Gerard actually found from music I had been trying to play but have now completely mastered and some of my favorite songs. My favorite band's name is displayed in the middle of a giant patch of blue sky, Muse proudly painted in the metallic paint that my best friend's boyfriend loves to use.

My ceiling is really the only remarkable part of my bedroom. My black wooden bed is in the the middle of the wall on the right, my bedside table next to it with a Totoro lamp sitting on the edge. To the right of my bed pressed against the back wall is my bookshelf filled with different novels and random trinkets that I've collected over the years at concerts, thrift stores, and conventions. My black desk is against the wall next to it with three textbooks and countless homework sheets strewn across it messily. I walk over and drop my bag next to the desk and turn on the PIXAR lamp so I can see which pieces are finished and then look up at the mural to see the glittery stars shining in the dim light.

My camera is set up in the left corner of the room in front of the railings that make it so I don't fall down the stairs. The ceiling is its lowest there and so I sit in my blood red armchair right in teh corner whenever I film, the tripod holding the camera so it looks down on me just the slightest bit to have both a good angle and lighting. I sit down in the chair and look up at the lense, rubbing the palm of my hand against my forehead.

I sigh and look over to my left to see my piano with the bench tucked in the foot area neatly as I left it on Saturday. My fingers start to tap against my legs as I think about practicing a piece but I shake my head and stand up to step behind the camera. I quickly turn it on and then walk over to my full length mirror in between my desk and closet to fix my hair and pull on my shirt so it rests perfectly across my shoulders and show my collarbones just slightly. There are red bags under my eyes that I decide to just ignore, not wanting to bother with stealing foundation that I sometimes use from my mother. Sighing once more, I walk back over to my chair and settle into it, pushing a smile onto my face, ready to do the one thing that helps me when I can't take life anymore.

"Hello Internet."

~~~~~~

My hands shake as I close my locker, my breathing slowly getting faster and faster. I look over and see Frank texting most likely Gerard as he goes to the other high school in town and try not to completely flip out. He looks up after a moment and his eyes go wide as he sees my shaking body.

"Woah, you okay?" He asks, pocketing his phone and grabbing both my shoulders in an effort to make me stop basically vibrating.

"No, Frank," I tell him, my voice shaking a little. "I have to go ask your ex out right now and I don't fucking want to."

"Oh right." He says and takes his hands off of me and instead just uses one to grab my arm and pull me away from our locker. "Okay, I have a few tips for you."

We walk down the hallway together, completely ignoring anyone who tries to get our attention in an effort to get this over with.

"So you'll need to not fucking shake when you ask her first of all." He rolls his eyes at me and decides to just hold my hand in his as we barge through the crowd. "Second, she likes bad boys, or so she told me so try not to be too nice, just act a bit like an asshole because otherwise she won't like you and this relationship will be even more hell than you expect it to be."

We walk out the main doors and over toward the tallest oak tree on school grounds, also known as Aria's Tree. She claimed it as her own last year when she found out that if she tanned anymore she would probably end up with skin cancer and then decided that she should just sit under the largest tree whenever she could. And that's where she is when we round the corner of the school, lying with her back against the trunk of the tree surrounded by all her cheerleader friends, most of whom are sucking their own boyfriend's faces off.

"Alright, she's right there." Frank points to her as if I hadn't already seen her. "I'm gonna stay here so she doesn't see me, but good luck dude." He squeezes and then drops my hand with an encouraging smile. I send one back to him and chew on my bottom lip nervously.

I start over toward her and her bright red hair a moment later. She doesn't notice me until I'm stood right in front of her, my hands stuffed in the pockets of my leather jacket and looking down at her dark green skater skirt and lacy white crop top that shows off the small part of her pale stomach that the high-waisted skirt doesn't cover. She looks up at me with a raised eyebrow but then stands up, her tall brown boots digging into the dry ground.

"Sam, right?" She asks, immediately making sure that I know she thinks she's above me.

"Dan actually," It takes an immense amount of self control not to roll my eyes. "How are you, Aria?" I mentally slap myself as I remember Frank's advice to be an asshole and then force a bored expression on my face as she starts looking at my outfit; black skinny jeans, white converse high tops, Origin of Symmetry shirt, and black leather jacket.

"I'm okay." She says, seeming to still be deciding whether I should even be allowed to talk to her. She suddenly looks up at me and smiles. "Nice jacket."

She reaches over and runs her hand down the leather on my arm.

"Thanks."

"So what's up with you?" She snaps into flirting mode, twirling a lock of ginger hair around her finger, biting her lip slightly.

"Oh well I'm actually the new football captain."

"Really?" She raises her eyebrows and lets go of her hair. "So I'm rid of Frank?"

"Yeah." I answer, not sure as to whether I should actually punch her like I want to.

"Thank god, he never wanted to fuck and well let's just say you look a bit more fit." She bites her lip again at that in a way that I'm sure would give any other guy a boner but I'm just wondering if her mouth hurts from all this biting.

"Yeah well, I figured you'd like me." Oh god that was the douchiest thing I've ever said. "So you'll be my girlfriend, right?"

"Of course, babe." She squeaks, throwing her arms around my neck and hugging me. I quickly place my hands on the bottom of her back and try not to notice how she's breathing on my neck. She pulls back after a moment and I take my arms out from around her waist. "Can't wait for our first time."

Oh. Okay then.

"Yeah, see you later." I stutter out and quickly walk away, my head down.

When I get back to him, Frank's laughing almost manically. I hit him in the shoulder and he straightens up from being bent over holding his stomach. I see tears in his eyes to accompany his smile and glare at him.

"What?" I demand loudly, swinging my arms out so they're on either side of my shoulders, hands open. "What is it you bastard?"

"Y-y-your face was amazing." He manages to get out between random bursts of laughter. "You looked like you were about to either faint or punch someone the whole time oh my god."

"Well then it's a fucking good thing she likes bad boys isn't it." I snap at him and he slowly stops himself from laughing.

"Sorry dude, you're just ridiculous." He says.

"Yeah well so are you." I start walking back to the main doors and he jogs up next to me, done laughing at this point as he knows I won't hesitate to slap the smirk straight off his face when I'm pissed.

We walk to the locker room without a word passing between us but not because of anger, just the fact that neither of us know what to say. This happens a lot with us, but neither of us really care when it happens, it can actually be really refreshing, not having to listen to or entertain someone else.

Frank slaps my back as I go into the locker room and I look back at him to see a smile on his face which I quickly copy.

"I'll be in the stands and Gee will be around in about twenty minutes, okay?"

I raise my eyebrows at him and let the corner of my mouth lift itself.

"Okay, thanks. See you then."

I turn around and push the door open quickly as I'm already late to get ready. Once I'm in I throw my backpack down against the cinder block wall and then grab my sport bag and move over to a bench where three other guys are pulling on their practice uniforms. I give them a small smile and unzip my bag hastily.

I pull out my practice shirt, pads, shoes, and pants and drop them down on the wooden bench unceremoniously. I tug my shirt off over my head and go to grab my uniform but am then interrupted by Mason's voice.

"Shit dude. You and Aria got into it early." He says, sounding impressed. I furrow my eyebrows.

"What? I just asked her out, what are you talking about?" His eyes widen and he blows a breath out of his mouth.

"Then where'd you get all the hickies?"

I can feel my brain shut down as I look down and am reminded of Monday night when I see all of Frank's marks. There are at least ten all strewn across my hips and a few more on my chest and right now I sure wish I could have at least felt the pleasure of the damn things because they're turning out to just be bringing me down.

"Oh ya know," I start, my mind working as quickly as it can to find some explanation for why I look like I was filming a porno earlier. "Just a one night stand before I got a girlfriend." I let out a small laugh and pull on my uniform shirt so I can cover up the bruised spots as quickly as possible.

"Oh I get it, just your last bit of freedom. Nice." He nods at me with a look of idiotic respect on his face.

"Yeah." I say, not sure how to respond to the statement. I then change into my uniform with record speed and manage to beat the guys in my row out of the locker room and into the field where all my team mates are talking in groups as Coach is just waiting at the end of the field on his phone. I furrow my eyebrows and walk over to the bleachers where I see Frank sat in the middle listening to music on his phone, silently swaying back and forth and everyone once in a while hitting his hands against his knees like he's playing the drums.

I jog over to the benches and go up to sit next to him, tapping my finger against his headphones to get his attention. He jumps slightly and pulls them off before turning what was apparently Closer to the Edge by Thirty Seconds to Mars off on his phone.

"Hey, do you know why we aren't doing shit?" I ask him and he rolls his eyes at me, taking his headphones off of his neck and setting them on top of his backpack behind him.

"The other team's coming today. Do you ever listen to Coach?" I start blushing and he just rolls his eyes again, this time with a smile on his face.

"You're fucking ridiculous, you know that right?"

"Yep." I say, completely content with that.

"Good." He looks away from me and out at the field, all his former teammates milling around in circles, eager to get a football in their hands. We sit in silence for another two minutes before I spot Gerard quickly making his way toward us with his hands in the pockets of his black hoodie and his head down.

He only looks up once he reaches Frank and I and sits down next to his boyfriend, placing his hand on his knee and squeezing it.

"Hey, Frankie." He says and looks around quickly before leaning over and pecking his cheek, making Frank blush slightly. I smile at their adorableness and also the fact that they're still okay after the past two days not that I ever doubted the power of an angry fuck.

"Hi, Gee." He says quietly with a small smile and grabs Gerard's hand, setting their entwined fingers on the bench between them to try to hide it.

I look out at the field to see a bus pulled up to the side of it and a group of people wearing purple and white filing out of it. I stand up and grab my helmet from beside me to walk down to the field and join my teammates to welcome the other team. I quickly say goodbye to the blushing couple sitting on the cold metal bench and make my way down to the grass.

Once I'm down I jog over to PJ and Josh, them talking about the band that they're planning on starting with PJ playing guitar and singing and Josh on drums. PJ messes with the brown curls on his head, trying to flatten them enough to pull his helmet on and not have them splay out all over his face and Josh runs his hands through his blue hair. I nod to them as they greet me and then stare ahead until I hear Coach yell my name.

"Howell! Come welcome them with me!" I look over at the guys with an exhausted smile and they laugh. I jog over to the coach and walk over to the group of teenagers by his side.

"Biersack!" He yells with a smile and I see who I assume is the other team's coach come make his way over to us. And once he's here and shaking my hand all I can think about is how much I would love for him to push me up against a wall and make out with me until my lips fall off because he has some fucking amazing cheekbones. "This is my team captain, Andy. Where's your guy?"

"Oh he's here somewhere." He turns around and asks the player behind him where the captain is and the teen goes off to grab his desired teammate. "He'll be here in a moment, Gaskarth will find him."

I stand next to Coach awkwardly, staring down at my cleats until I hear the other coach speak again and look up to see a pair of piercing blue eyes staring across at me.

"This is Phil Lester, now what's your name boy?"

"D-Dan Howell." I stutter out, my eyes still caught in the other team's captain's eyes.

"Well I wish you luck Howell, this guy will tackle you to the ground right once he gets the chance." Coach Beirsack says and there's only one thing I have to say about that:

I can't wait.


	6. Being a Flaming Homosexual Can Be Hard

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this one is kind of a filler!

I find it especially difficult to concentrate on the scrimmage after finding out that the hot as hell captain of the other team is planning on tackling me. My eyes end up traveling over to him in his chest padding far too often throughout the three hour period and honestly I know that I shouldn't be looking at him at all but that goddamn black hair is taking over my brain as if it's the actual darkness that I fall asleep to every night. I wish I could fall asleep with his darkness every night.

I miss three passes throughout the game that I would normally have caught with ease and I hear Samstrung telling Coach Biersack that I'm on some drug for a mental disorder I don't have as an excuse and I don't think I've ever hated that man any more. Phil of course is perfect though, carrying out every pass perfectly, throwing over sixty yards that I can't say I expected from him given how thin he is but I guess he must be hiding some real biceps underneath those shoulder pads.

Gerard and Frank watch the whole practice, Frank screaming out play names and instructions so loudly that the team doesn't even listen to Coach, just him much to Samstrung's annoyance. Gerard simply sits next to him with his hood up to make sure that the coach doesn't recognize him as he yelled for Frank to "shut his no good faggot pie hole" which made me cringe and accidentally run into one of the other team's players. And it wasn't even Phil, just some weird guy with a brown fringe across the top of his forehead and a slightly rat like but still handsome face. He just grunted and ran away from me after I started blushing brightly.

But now that they're gone, I can feel my mind finally start clearing, start thinking about how I'm most likely about to get one of the worst "talking to's" ever from Coach instead of the blue clad, blue eyed beauty that I actually touched hands with earlier when we had to pick up footballs off the field once we had finished warm ups.

"Howell!" I hear the middle aged man who I have grown to despise over the past four years call from across the field. Blowing a tired breath out of my mouth, I jog over to him, helmet in hand.

"Hey Coach," He stares at me with narrowed eyes and his hands gripping his hips tightly.

"What happened with you today? I had to tell Biersack some lie to make up for you missing all those balls!"

I use all my restraint not to snap back at him about how he really shouldn't be telling other coaches that I'm snorting coke or some shit like that and force a slightly ashamed look onto my face before he decides to make me stay late.

"Yeah, sorry. I was just a bit distracted." I mumble, looking down at my cleats in a way that I hope makes me look like I feel guilty.

"What the hell were you so distracted by, kid? We had the whole team here, you aren't allowed to be distracted!" He yells, waving the papers in his hands everywhere as his face turns slightly red.

I look up from my cleats and over his shoulder to see Frank standing up with narrowed eyes in the stands, Gerard pulling on his sleeve to try to get him to sit back down next to him on the metal bench. But Frank won't budge, his hands in fists, arms straight as wood down to the ground and clearly gritting his teeth. He must have heard Coach, he's always been very protective of me.

I continue to stare at him as Gerard stands up and pulls him into a kiss in an effort to distract, succeeding easily. I start to panic, trying to figure out what I should tell Samstrung. I mean I can't just go "oh yeah sorry. I just desperately want to get in the other team captain's pants and so I was just staring at him the whole time. Whoops, gotta go, a lot of homework tonight."

"Dan," I look back at my angry football coach. "Why were you distracted?"

I try to scrape an idea together quickly and then finally something clicks.

"Well you see," I start, already internally applauding myself on my great idea. "I was just distracted by how I had just asked Aria Young out right before practice, I was just thinking about what I wanna do for our first date and stuff."

He raises his eyebrows and nods his head with a knowing smile. "I get it, Dan, I get it. She's hot, just the girl I would wanna date if I were your age. But next practice try not to think so much about your new girlfriend." He claps his hand on my back as I try to ignore the pedophilic comment he made about the seventeen year old girl. "Now go on, I'll see you tomorrow."

I give him a wave and run off to the locker room, ready for the interrogation that's most likely to come from my classmates about Aria.

"So he bought your bullshit, did he?" Frank says as I walk over to him and Gerard after changing. The latter has his arm wrapped around his short boyfriend's waist, luckily most everyone has already left for the night.

"What do you mean?" I ask, dropping my sports bag down next to the lamppost next to their parking spot. Frank raises his eyebrows at me and smirks.

"I know you were just staring at the hot piece of ass who plays quarterback on the other team and don't you dare lie to me Dan Howell or I will tackle you just like on the field and believe me, it hurts a hell of a lot more on asphalt."

He smiles at me innocently as I glare at him, Gerard trying to hold a laugh, burying his head in Frank's neck. I finally just sigh and roll my eyes once he bursts out laughing along with his fucking annoying boyfriend giggling like a little girl like he always does around Gerard.

"Fine, was it really that obvious though?" I blush and rub my hand against my elbow, crossing my chest self consciously.

"Only to me," He shrugs. "But that's just because I can read you like a fucking cheap novel. I don't think anyone else figured out that you were just being a flaming homosexual though, don't worry."

I roll my eyes and pick my bag up again to throw in the back of Gerard's truck. I just want to get out of this goddamn parking lot already and get home to do some homework or maybe just pass out on my bed or cry over having to date one of the biggest bitches I've ever had the misfortune of meeting. I'll see how the evening goes in a bit.

"Ready to go then, Daniel?" Gerard teases, jumping into the driver's seat of his truck and Frank sitting in the middle seat, pressed against his boyfriend like if he isn't touching him he'll just die right then and there.

"Yes Gerard." I say back while buckling my seat belt. Ever since we met we've had an odd relationship, always teasing each other and getting on each other's nerves but are still friends, hugging goodbye every time we see each other. I guess part of it may also be that neither of us have ever really been popular enough to make other friends but I try not to think about it like that.

Frank leans back against his seat as Gerard starts driving the truck out of the student lot. He looks over and smiles at me in a way that makes my heart flip even more than that hot Phil guy. But god, I have to get over him or dating this girl will get worse and I'll never be able to get into an actual relationship, I'll just end up holding myself back in hope of this unreachable guy loving me like he does Gerard.

It takes fifteen moments or awkward conversation about how I'll attempt to impress Aria to arrive at my house and I jump out of the bright truck as quickly as possible, not wanting to be stuck in that cloud of sexual frustration for any longer. It really is hard for them to be discreet when it comes to their relationship, I have no idea how they haven't been discovered yet because of their actions. Whispering can only help so much.

When I walk through the front door I can smell the chicken cooking in the oven, all the spices leaking out of the cracks. I drop my backpack and duffle bag down next to the door and shuffle over to the kitchen where I find my dad mixing iced tea powder into a pitcher of water.

I smile as he looks up and asks me how my day has been. I might not like my mother much but I've always had a strong relationship with my father. He's always been the one to ask if I'm alright instead of telling me to get up and brush it off, the one to tell me it's okay to be different, the one who has inspired to me to become who I want: a YouTuber.

I already have 150,000 subscribers under my account name danisnotonfire. I started making the videos as coping methods for when life became just too difficult to focus on anything I needed to do, so I made ridiculous videos that I'm already growing to regret. No one from my school knows about the account, even Frank thinks that I just use my video camera to film piano covers or something like that.

"I'm alright, we finally had our first scrimmage with that other team." I tell my dad and he smiles at me.

"That's good. Can you set the table and call your brother over? He's on the XBox."

"Sure."

I walk over to grab the light blue plates and yell my brother's name while setting them down on our square oak table.

"Adrian! Get in here and set the silverware out!"

My brother runs into the room a minute later, brown fringe in his face and brown eyes looking over at me. He looks almost exactly like I did when I was thirteen, I once convinced a particularly dumb friend of mine that he was the old me who I brought to life to be my tiny slave. Adrian enjoyed playing that prank with me, we're close but not so much that we're constantly together. The best way to describe out relationship would be that we're always there for each other but most of the time in the next room.

"Hey Dan. How was practice?" He reaches into the silverware drawer that I'm standing next to and grabs four forks, spoons, and knives.

"It was okay, how was play practice?" I ask, completely aware of the shit storm that's about to occur.

Adrian groans and looks up at me with a glare. "We've been over this Dan!" I hear his voice raise an octave. "First of all it's called rehearsal unlike sports. And second, Sound of Music isn't a play, it's a musical." He storms over to the table and starts slamming the silver forks down on the table. "God it's like you do this just to irritate me."

I roll my eyes at his dramatic tone, but I guess that's really all you can expect from a young theater student.

"Oh Adrian, I do." I sing to him and curtsy as the timer goes off for the chicken. My dad gets up, laughing quietly and takes the food out of the oven and sets it down in the pan on a pot holder in the center of the table.

"Karen!" He yells as he takes off his oven mits and I sit down at the table.

"What?" My mother yells from her office down the hall.

"Time for dinner!" He and Adrian sit down in their respective spots and I smile, ready to relax into an evening of not thinking about any of the shit that I've gotten myself into over the past week.

Suddenly I hear my mother's high heels clicking quickly down the hall and she appears in front of the table with a large smile on her face.

"So I heard you're dating Aria Young, Daniel."

Well so much for relaxation.


	7. Hurricane Karen

I look down at my shiny plate as my mother pulls her wooden chair out so she can hurriedly sit down in it and start tapping her nails against the table top like she always does when she knows she's about to learn some new gossip. I can feel her gaze on me and practically hear her thoughts begging me to look at her and tell her all about my blossoming relationship with the bitchiest girl in this county.

"Yes, I am." I say, looking up at her and promptly reach for the wooden spoon in the bowl of corn next to me. She looks at me, expecting more as I dish the vegetables onto my plate and my dad and brother just look between us as if they're expecting a fist fight breaking out over the egg noodles. I reach for the carving knife to start slicing off a piece of chicken when I'm suddenly interrupted by my mother's sharp voice.

"Daniel," I look over at her and fight myself to make sure I don't raise my eyebrows because goddamn she looks so desperate to know the inner workings of my nonexistent (that fact unknown to her and my so called girlfriend) love life. "Do tell us about Aria and how you have come to be her boyfriend."

I come very close to just telling her to fuck off but eventually just force out: "She's attractive and the football captain always dates the head cheerleader so it's not like she was gonna say no."

"Oh," She raises her manicured eyebrows and smiles, tapping her nails again. "I didn't realize that you were the captain, wasn't that Iero child filling that position just last week?"

I grit my teeth and give her a fake smile. "Yes Frank was the captain but now that he's not on the team, I am."

"So Iero isn't on the te-"

"Mom, his name is Frank!" I yell, even surprising myself by interrupting her. I shake my head and look down at the table, closing my eyes and taking a few deep breaths before looking up at her shocked face. "His name is Frank and he's my friend. Can't you respect that? Or at least respect him?"

There's silence for at least a minute after that. Silence that holds my impending doom back like a lion tamer holding the beast off with a chair, sure to be taken over at any moment. My mother glares at me from across the table, her artificially tanned arms crossed against her chest. I'm actually a bit nervous as to what she'll say but not as much as my brother seems to be, him staring at her seemingly willing her to look over at him and whisper in his ear exactly what she's going to spit at me before anyone else knows. A sneak peek to my demise.

"Dan," I'm surprised to here my dad speak from the end of the table. I sweep my gaze away from my seething mother and over to him. His face is tinted pink and his back is hunched slightly so he can whisper to me easily. He continues in the same way, wide eyes and all. "I think it would be best if you took your dinner up to your room and did some of your homework now. You've already showered, right?"

I nod slowly at him, silently thanking every god that I don't believe in for how wonderful my father is.

"Good," He nods at me with an awkwardly placed smile, not fitting into the environment it's in at all. "Now go on, just grab some chicken and pasta and eat at your desk or something. I'll see you tomorrow morning."

He forces one more lopsided grin on his face as I hurriedly scoop the egg noodles onto my plate and slice off some chicken, my mother's viscous eyes never looking away from me.

Once I have everything I need I quickly leave the room, trying to get out as soon as possible but also not wanting to spill my food down my front not being a good combination as she gets another half a minute to look at me in a way that pretty much gives away her current murderous ideas. Although I guess if she does murder me we can sue and get her taken away in some child protection agency van.

I rush up to my bedroom, miraculously making it there without dropping any of my noodles on the narrow wooden steps. Our house was built in the late 1800's, completely of wood and is quite small because of it. When we moved in we had to add onto it, build a garage, a storage area, and a family room in the basement and build brick on the exterior so the walls would be stronger. But the basement project wasn't nearly as big as making the attic into a bedroom for me. There had previously only been two bedrooms, one small one that Adrian is in and a master bedroom where my parents stay and my mother takes up most of with all her random crap. It took over three months for the area to be turned into a suitable place for me to live, routing the heating up into the attic and making the floor stable enough to roll a bed in as it had been really weak before due to the century worth of wood rot and termite infestation. 

But finally after living on my brother's floor for a month after moving in, I was finally able to move into it, make it my and pretty soon after have the ceiling made into Gerard's largest masterpiece. It took a while to bring all my furniture in because of the narrow doors and hallways but we were eventually able to actually put my room together, making it just the way I like it: a fire hazard because of all the posters and random trinkets. 

Sitting down on my bed, I place my dinner in my lap and start stabbing at my egg noodles possibly more violently than necessary but I can't really help it when I'm imagining that they're my mother's smug face. I blow air out of my mouth as a piece of pasta flies off my plate and onto the wooden floor. I continue to eat my meal but pull my phone out of my back pocket, setting it on my bed and typing in my pass code with my index finger. I choose the tumblr app and start scrolling through my activity, seeing three new followers for my main blog and seven for my bondage blog. That one's gotten really popular lately... 

My thoughts are interrupted by my phone actually ringing which I can safely say is not something it does more than once a month. I answer it though, recognizing the number as Frank and Gerard's land line. I still don't understand why they pay for that thing when they both have cell phones but I didn't really feel like arguing with their 'better safe than sorry' logic the night they paid their first expense. 

"Hey." I say, leaning back against my headboard, my legs still crossed and not letting my food slip on the floor to join the abandoned egg noodle lying on the plank. 

"Hey. You done the English assignment you never finished?" I roll my eyes, of course he's calling to check in on the status of a piece of homework I couldn't care less about. 

"Not yet. Please don't rant at me."

"I won't. I was just wondering if you'd do something for me tonight?" He sounds hesitant, like he's pretty sure I'll turn down the chance to skip out on doing homework. I'm already ready to jump in my car and help him with whatever the hell he needs but then my brain switches on. He's done some pretty stupid shit, I better find out what this is that I'll be dealing with.

"Depends," I say after chewing lightly on my bottom lip. "What'll I need to do?" 

"Well Gerard has this friend-"

"Let me stop you right there." I sit up and stab a piece of chicken, lifting it to my mouth but not biting into it yet. "Most of Gerard's friends are drug dealers, Frank."

"I know," I shove the meat in my mouth and roll my eyes at him again, this time at his pleading tone. "But this one isn't."

"Who is it then?" I ask impatiently.

"This girl named Lindsey or something. She goes to his school and her boyfriend has apparently been cheating on her and we need to go teach him a lesson." 

I raise my eyebrows and set my fork down on my plate.

"I'm not beating anyone up for you, dude."

"I know," He says and I can sense his eyes rolling through the phone. "We're just gonna prank him and get out of there. It'll be easy. Please?"

I can feel myself cave as he draws out the "e" in please.

"Fine, but when are we gonna get back? I can't miss another day of physics." 

"By one I promise." He says, obviously excited. "Thank you so much, I'll see you in ten minutes." 

"You're wel-" I start but am then cut off by the loud dial tone coming out of my phone. I groan and take my plate out of my lap. I guess tonight will just be another all night homework extravaganza once I get back. Dear god I hate those. I stand up and grab my leather jacket off the end of the railing next to the stairs, revealing the small wooden knob. I pull it on and shove my phone in my pocket before turning toward the window next to my bed and starting to pull the screen out.

Suddenly though I hear my bedroom door creak open and pull my hands away quickly, thankfully unsuccessful with taking my screen out of the window. I turn around to see my brother standing at the top of my small staircase awkwardly, his right hand rubbing down his left arm. 

"Hey, Adrian," I say, resting my hand on the top of my headboard and leaning against it in a hopefully casual manner. 

"Hey, Dan. You sneaking out?" He raises his eyebrows while walking over to my desk and collapsing into my office chair unceremoniously. 

"Possibly," I walk walk over toward him cautiously. "You gonna tell Mom?"

"No way," He says as if I'm an idiot for simply suggesting such a thing. But well it's not like he hasn't done that before. "She already wants to kill you, I don't her to actually go through with it." I raise my eyebrows and walk over to the other side of my bed before flopping down on it lazily.

"Why thank you, Adrian. I don't know what I would ever do without you." I say sarcastically before straightening up and resting my elbows on my knees, my shoes tapping against the wood floor. I spread my legs a bit and set my chin in my open palms, tapping my fingers against my cheekbones lightly. "You think she's really that angry?"

"I don't know but Dad had to calm her down after you left so I just ate as quickly as possible to avoid the next storm. I can see it now," He spreads his arms out over his head and has a small smile on his face, his eyes sparkling. "Hurricane Karen, oh no wait it was just Karen Howell blowing up yet again." I laugh at him and he giggles, looking over at me. "It'll be all over the news."

"Perfect." I laugh at him for a moment more until we descend into a slightly awkward silence. "Listen Adrian, I really do need to go. Frank's probably waiting for me outside by now." 

He nods at me and pushes himself up out of the chair before giving me a small smile and stuffing his hands in his pockets. I get up in front of him and pull his lanky form against my chest for a quick hug. Once I pull away he looks up at me with another small smile.

"Don't die with Frank, he's not cool enough for you to die because of." He says, backing away from me and toward the steps of my room. 

"Alright then." I walk back over to my screen and start working on it. Once I have it popped out I look back at Adrian. "You'll cover for me right?"

"Yeah, have fun big brother." He says, giving me a wave and going out my bedroom door.

"See ya little brother."


	8. No One Likes Bob Bryar

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a long one :)

"Hey sorry I took so long." I say, jumping into the passenger seat of Frank's truck. He looks over at me with a short nod and then turns the key in the ignition.

"Yeah," He mumbles after a moment, his mind on the road and not whether I can understand him or not. "What happened?"

"Adrian caught me before I left so I made sure he wouldn't tell Satan." I say causally, crossing my arms over my chest and leaning back against the leather seat.

"Ah so is Satan your mother's official name now?" Frank jokes, shaking his head as he laughs quietly.

"Yep," He turns right onto a dirt road with potholes strewn across it in a way that is much less than safe. "So who is this guy anyway?" I pick at my fingernails as we're jostled around in the metal vehicle.

"Some guy named Bob. All I know is his address and that he's a fucking asshole." I raise my eyebrows and start chewing on the side of my thumbnail.

"So does he live in town or are we gonna be driving to Idaho or something?" I ask, not wanting to bother my friend but I really should work on that assignment and the science project that's due in two days that I haven't even started.

"Nah he's just the next town over. Still goes to Gee's school though. The guy apparently tried to rope him into his band or something and he hasn't talked to the dick since."

"I see."

I sit in the comfortable silence and play with the zipper on my jacket, sliding it up and down over and over until Frank yells at me to, and I quote, "Stop that before he zips it all the way up, down my throat, and throws me into the woods." Although I simply respond with "You're too small to even lift me up how the fuck are you gonna throw me in the woods."

This, as you can expect from two teenage guys evolved in a full out battle about who has a bigger dick. I already know that I have a bigger one though, I mean I've taken his before.

I've started vaguely remembering the events of that night after I drank that last beer. Most of it was dick related things, both jokes and the actual body parts and well I think I might actually be better off if my memories stop where they have because although I would love to remember losing my virginity I don't know how much I want to remember about Frank fucking me in a grimy college bar.

I mean I've always wanted to be with Frank of course. He's hot, funny, nice (or at least to me), talented, etc. I don't know why someone wouldn't be attracted to him. But I don't want to remember being with him that night because it wasn't real. It wasn't real in the slightest. He doesn't actually love me, he loves Gerard and no matter how much that hurts me I know it's for the best. I guess I am making progress in getting over him though with the dangerous crush I have on the other team's captain.

Oh god that captain is pretty. He's so fucking pretty. I've always thought that black hair was attractive but he wears it in a way that makes it fucking adorable as well. I mean Frank looks rough and punk with it while he just looks like someone who wouldn't hurt a fly even if it killed his entire family. I'm still pissed that I couldn't keep my feelings concealed during practice the other day, according to Frank and Gerard I was acting pretty damn obvious and that's not a good habit to form, especially with Coach Fuckwad being there.

"Hey Dan you okay?" I'm shocked out of my daydreaming about the black haired boy whose name I can't remember anymore. I look over at Frank with slightly parted lips that I quickly close into a small smile.

"Yeah, we almost there?" I watch him roll his eyes at me with furrowed eyebrows.

"Did you seriously not notice that we're in a Walmart parking lot?" I jump a little in my seat when I look out the windshield to see the dim parking lot lights shining down on the parking spots next to us. The Walmart to my right is the biggest one around and only has four out of the seven letters lit up due to management actually not giving a shit whether or not their store is called Walmart or Wlma. "I guess not..." Frank says before pulling his keys out of the ignition and dropping them in the pocket of his jean jacket. "Let's go."

He hops out of the truck before I can even unbuckle my seat belt, slamming the door behind him and already starting down the dark parking lot, short shadow projecting in front of him. I jump out as soon as I know I have my wallet in the pocket of my leather jacket, figuring that Frank will probably make me pay for all this shit because he forgets his own wallet on a daily basis (or so he says). I jog up to him, swinging my arms lazily and step in time with him into the huge Walmart.

"So what are we getting for this trip that you decided to take me on at," I take my phone out of my pocket and turn it on to see the time light up on the screen. "9:49 in the evening?"

Frank doesn't answer me or even look over until we're through the noisy automatic doors and standing in the harsh flourescent light that occupies seemingly every one of these stores. I squint up at the lights, flipping them off with both hands because well that's just the kind of shit you can get away with in Walmart.

"Just a couple supplies to fuck up this Bob guy's life." He says, looking over at me with a devious smile and glint in his hazel eyes. He suddenly snaps his head back around and stalks off in the opposite direction, leaving me to speed walk after him, looking like the idiot sidekick that I am.

My short friend turns into a broad main aisle quickly and continues to fucking power walk like all those middle aged women you see on the side of the road when you drive to school in the morning through the store. He finally stops in front of the large wall of spray paint cans and I almost walk straight into him, not expecting his sudden cease in movement.

"Spray paint? I expected something more extreme from you Frank I have to admit." I say simply, putting my hands on my hips and staring up at the locked plastic container filled with cans of colorful spray paint. "Why do they even use all these padlocks anyway?"

"Do you not pay any attention in health?" Frank asks, looking over at me and rolling his eyes at my confused expression. "Fuckboys get high off this shit. Remember inhalants? They spray the paint in a bag and sniff it, really stupid. And that's me, the guy who's snorted coke with his boyfriend behind a foreign film theater, saying that."

"Wait what film place?" I ask and Frank blows a sharp breath out of his nose while scanning the prices of the paint.

"I don't know. But I do remember there was this Swedish film about a goat there that Gerard made me see with him but then we ended up just making out in the back and got kicked out. You should've seen the look on that old dude's face when he turned around to see Gerard going for my zipper. I swear, his eyebrows almost flew off his fucking forehead." He says in a nonchalant tone that I would have been surprised by if I hadn't known the guy.

"You guys are so weird." I mumbled, making Frank smirk next to me. He surprisingly doesn't say anything but instead sets off down the aisle toward a customer service desk. He stops in front of the white counter and rings a diner bell once he sees that there's no one behind it.

"Probably singing in that goddamn choir or something." He says under his breath, laughing at his terrible attempt at a joke afterwards. A moment later a lanky white kid wearing a beanie steps out from behind a wall rubbing his eyes like he just woke up.

"Shit!" Frank whispers and jumps behind me, hiding his face with my shoulder and his hand.

"What?" I ask him with no doubt that I look like a complete idiot with the perplexed look on my face. I twist my head around to look at my cowering friend.

"That's Gee's brother. He hates my guts, his name's M-"

"Hello my name is Mikey, is there any way I can help you?" I snap my head back around to see Mikey looking at me with tired blue eyes and his hair splayed out across his forehead from under his hat that makes him look a bit like a scarecrow coming undone.

"Um yeah," I say awkwardly and he looks at me in a way that I can already tell he's about as patient as my mother when she knows she's about to find out who screwed that Barakat kid this time. I shift my weight awkwardly under his cruel stare until Frank finally comes to my rescue.

"Eight cans of spray paint: black, blue, red, green, orange, yellow, white, and purple. All Sabotaz, I'll be at the front just bring them with you." He whispers in my ear and then flips his hood up, running away from his boyfriend's younger brother as quickly as possible.

I lift my eyes from the coffee stain on the floor that I'd been staring at to Mikey again and see his cocked eyebrow. "So I need-"

"What's up with your friend?" He interrupts, crossing his arms over his chest and making himself officially the worst and nosiest customer service person I've ever met.

"He's just shy." I give him the worst excuse I've ever heard.

"Then why was he up front when I walked out? He scared of me or something?" Mikey smirks at that and I can't help but think about how much this kid looks like a fucking lanky spider and nothing like anyone would be afraid of. Then again Frank is afraid of spiders...

"No. Why the hell would he be afraid of you?" I spit, surprising both of us. "Now can I just get some spray paint?"

The blond teenager looks me up and down slowly in a way that makes me increasingly uncomfortable and then snatches what I assume are the keys for the spray paint cages off a hook on the wall next to him. "Sure."

He disappears behind the wall for a moment before opening the door next to me, emerging exactly the way a spider would, long legs taking large and slow steps. I can tell he's trying to intimidate me in some way with the way he's attempting to push his chest out but he just looks comical given how big his Walmart shirt is on him.

I follow him over to the end of the aisle of paint cans and he twirls the key ring on his finger, looking over at me expectantly. If he was chewing gum he would look like a popular girl from every high school movie you've ever seen.

"Okay so I need the Sabotaz stuff," I start and he rolls his eyes and walks to the middle of the aisle before stopping and resting most of his weight on his right leg, his hip jutting out.

"Okay what colors?" Mikey asks as he slips the needed key into the lock of the case, swinging it open lazily and almost hitting himself in the face with it.

"Okay I need," I start counting on my fingers while awkwardly trying to recite the needed shades. "Black, blue, green, purpl-"

"Slow down, kid" The exceedingly annoying worker interrupts me yet again and I bunch my hands into my fists at my sides. "I can't get them all at the same time can I?" He starts reaching into the case to grab the cans at the slowest pace I can imagine he can manage and I can't help but want to punch him so hard his goddamn gray beanie falls right off his head.

I do somehow manage to keep myself from starting a fight in the middle of Walmart though as he sets the first four cans on the ground next to him.

"Alright, any others?" He sighs and gnaws on his fingernails while waiting for me to finish listing off my needed supplies.

"Red, orange. yellow, and white." I tell him through gritted teeth and a terribly fake smile.

"Okay okay," He says, raising his arms up above his head. "I don't need any attitude from you."

I glare at the back of his head and flip him off once as he grabs the last of my paint and then sets it down next to the other cans.

"Here you go," He drawls while locking the case up again and looking over at me. "Thank you for shopping at Walmart, have a great day."

Then Mikey walks away, and it's a good thing too because otherwise he would have ended up stuffed in one of those cases right with all the spray paint if he had uttered one more word.

~~~~~

"Fuck you." I snarl at Frank while dumping four cans of spray paint in his arms next to the self checkout.

"Sorry Dan, already taken." He says, winking at me and turning to the register to scan the purple paint.

"Didn't stop you the other night did it?" I can't help but think as he throws cans into gray plastic bags.

"I can't believe you left me with that fuckwad." I spit, still not quite calmed down from my encounter with Gerard's pesky little brother.

"Well it's not like I could've stayed. He never would've given us the paint and I don't think you wanna see how he gets when I'm there." Frank slides his debit card that I really doubt has any money on it through the slot and signs off the payment with the pen attached to the screen.

"Well I can't quite imagine he could be any more irritating that he just was." I mumble and grab the plastic bags before starting out of the large chain store, this time Frank following me.

"He was that bad?" He asks, laughing at my frustrated tone.

"You have no idea." I roll my eyes and throw the shopping bags into the back of the truck once we reach it.

"Sure I don't." He mumbles while jumping in the cab of the vehicle.

"What do you mean?" I ask him, curiosity sparked by his tone and sudden grim look on his face.

He starts to truck and begins pulling out while blowing a long breath out of his mouth. "Gerard's family hates me, Dan you know that. Marina is the only one who doesn't want me fucking dead."

"What do they do when they see you? It must be kinda bad if you had to leave right once you saw that twerp." I watch him with genuine worry that I hope he can sense.

"They think I turned Gee gay and they can never leave me alone about that."

Silence fills the truck as we speed down another dirt road. I can tell that the rejection from his boyfriend's family hurts him a lot. Frank doesn't take rejection well, he can't take disappointing anyone, I'm surprised he even survived being kicked off the team. Even with the fact that Gerard's family doesn't even accept him I have no doubt that the rejection hurts Frank. He's well liked and when someone he cares about doesn't feel that way about him he goes all out trying to get them to. I can only imagine what kind act Mikey rejected him for that made him completely give up. Frank Iero has never been one to give up.

"I'm sorry." I say quietly, knowing that that statement doesn't cover even a millionth of what I want to say to him. Luckily for me, he understands.

"Not your fault, just theirs. I tried to get them to like me but they never will. I accepted that a while ago." He sighs and turns into an apartment building's parking lot.

"This Bob's place?"

"Oh no," Frank says, looking over at me with a devious grin. "We have to pick up Sasha now."

~~~~~

Three minutes later I'm sat on a hot pink love seat with Frank awkwardly eating a chocolate chip and probably pot cookie staring at his friend Sasha.

Never in a million years would I have ever guessed that Sasha was going to be a drag queen.

"So boys, how are you?" She asks, picking at her tiny leopard tank top that clearly shows off her what I assume to be fake cleavage unless she got top surgery, I don't know what she's done to make her job easier.

"I'm okay. How are you, Sasha?" Frank says with a smile on his face, making me wonder just how long he's known her and well just how long he's known drag queens period.

"I'm alright, Frankie, I'm alright." She answers, stretching her puffy red lips into a kind smile. "Now who is your friend here?" She looks over at me and I'm given time to really look at her.

Sasha has straight, bright red hair that flows down to the middle of her breasts and light green eyes that perfectly complement it. Her skin is almost as pale as Gerard's which is quite the feat and it looks perfectly smooth, or that could be the excessive amount of makeup she's wearing. She has thick black eyeliner around her eyes that could rival Pete Wentz's and eyeshadow the same color as her hair. He fake eyelashes have glitter in them that sparkle when the light hits them at certain angles. Her large lips are bright red as well and I'm honestly impressed that she doesn't have any lipstick on her front teeth. She's wearing a black bra that shows quite obviously due to the fact that her tank top is about three sizes too small on her but somehow still looks good on her sturdy torso. Her black leather miniskirt fit snugly on her hips and she has fishnets on her long thin legs. Her outfit is finished off with a pair of bright red stilettos and honestly I wouldn't even have a second thought on her being a woman if we hadn't walked in on her putting her makeup on and talking about how "drag queens are the best queens".

"This is Dan, he's my best friend. We were on the football team together before I was kicked off last week." Frank tells her, bumping my arm with his elbow as if to silently scold me for flat out staring at her.

"Best friend and I haven't met him? That's a crime, Frankie!" She says, looking over at him while extending her manicured hand over to me. I shake it and give her a small, most likely very awkward looking smile. She retracts her hand after a moment, her red nails scraping my palm a bit in the process.

"I know it's just that Gee never really wanted him to know about the whole drag thing. But I needed to bring him along tonight and of course you have a very important role in all of this." Frank says, making me process exactly what he means by the drag thing, Gee couldn't be a drag queen, there's no way.

"Ah," Sasha says, folding her fingers together and placing her hands in her lap. "Well it's very nice to meet you, Dan." She nods at me and I give her another smile before looking over at my friend on the couch next to me, silently urging him to explain this whole fucking situation because I don't know about anything that they're talking about. I look back over at Sasha again though as she starts speaking again. "So you don't know about Party Poison?"

"What?" I ask, confused beyond belief and eyebrows furrowed so much that they most likely look like they've completely joined together.

"Gee," Frank speaks up next to me, making me look over at him and his flushed face. "His drag queen name is Party Poison." He looks down in his lap and goes even redder than before.

"Gee's an actual drag queen?" I exclaim, not believing my ears at all. Gerard has always been so masculine in my eyes, always making terrible jokes and swearing and drawing (really greatly detailed and beautiful) dicks on everything he can find. It's nearly impossible to even attempt to imagine him in an outfit like Sasha's.

"Well kind of," Sasha says, making me look over at her, legs now uncrossed and spread slightly to show a black thong that I wouldn't ever expect to see a guy wearing. "He sometimes helps out around the gay club I work at for extra cash or something. The kid started off just clearing tables last year I think but after a couple months we started talking and he told me how awesome he thought it was that I could go up there and dance and in his words, 'be a fucking hot woman' for pay." She stops to laugh lightly at that as if she's remembering the one time her teacher spelled their name wrong in front of the whole class as opposed to my best friend's boyfriend becoming a drag queen at seventeen. Or maybe you could say a dancing queen. "So I talked to my boss and got him working one night a week as a dancer instead of a bus boy. But then once he got up there and started, he never wanted to stop and well he was pretty good so he became a full time dancer, four nights of the week. He's paid under the table of course, it's not exactly legal to have a seventeen year working at a gay bar."

I sit there on that bright pink couch completely dumbfounded, my chin nearing the floor. "Gerard's a stripper?"

"Oh no no no," Frank jumps in, leaning his elbows on his knees and talking with his hands like he always does, this time more dramatically though. "He hasn't taken one stitch of clothing off, he refused outright, saying that he only wanted someone he loves to see him naked. And of course that would be me."

"Okay." I say slowly, still confused. "But how do you two know each other?"

I aim the question at Frank and see his face go back to being beet red like before, his mouth opening and closing over and over as he tries to sort out what to say to me.

"Frankie here comes to the shows." Sasha says across from me suddenly, making my jaw drop again as I look between her and my best friend, not sure whether to believe the decked out drag queen or not. "Well I mean not all of them of course because he's a good little student but a lot of them."

Frank looks up at me through his black fringe, obviously embarrassed. "Is that true?" I ask, my eyebrows raised at him. He nods hesitantly and I can feel my head start spinning, how had I been completely clueless to all this? "Okay." I look down at my lap and twirl my fingers together slowly, still taking all this new information.

"Here, I actually have some pictures." I snap my head up to see Sasha sliding her finger across a leopard print clad iPhone. "At least I think I still have the pictures of Gee and him at the club."

"No please don't!" Frank begs, trying to snatch the phone away in an attempt to end his embarrassment but Sasha slaps his hand away casually before passing her phone to me. I take it from her as he curls in on himself, arms wrapped around his legs and knees to his chest where his face is buried.

I look down at the screen and immediately feel my stomach drop out when I see a picture of Gee grinding on Frank in the middle of a stage filled with six other drag queens cheering them on from the sides. Gee's hair is teased up into a large red bun and he has dark red eyeshadow with thick black eyeliner and lipstick. He's wearing a short black strapless dress that hugs his curves in ways that I was hoping to never have to see. His face is contorted in what I'm guessing is a face of pleasure as he dances with his boyfriend but quite honestly I don't even know. I look down to his feet to see stilettos that must be at least six inches tall, I have to say I'm impressed that he can do anything in those.

"Wow." I say under my breath, staring at my completely wasted best friend in the picture.

"Just keep going, there are at least ten more." Sasha tells me and I look up at her with widened eyes. Frank lets out a groan of protest as I look back at the phone and start scrolling through seventeen other pictures of Gerard in various outfits and Frank with him either dancing or making out furiously. I guess my friend has a kink.

"Please just stop." I hear Frank say suddenly as I stare at a picture of Gerard kissing him against a wall, dark red lingerie and all. I tear my eyes away from the screen to see him looking down at the screen as well, obviously so embarrassed that he'd rather the Earth split in half and engulf him than be in this situation.

"Yeah, okay." I say and hand Sasha's phone back to her much to his relief. He lets out a sigh and rests his head on my shoulder, draping one arm over my waist to grab my other side and pull me into him like he sometimes does when he needs someone to comfort him.

"Thanks." He whispers in my ear before burying his face in my neck, making me squirm a tiny bit.

"Aw you guys are cute friends!" Sasha exclaims, making Frank take his face out of my neck and look over at her with narrowed eyes. "Promise me you won't ever cheat on Gee with this guy though?"

"Of course not!" Frank says immediately, making me feel very guilty for not just telling him about what happened just a few nights ago.

"Good, he might even be a bigger twink than Gee anyway, I don't think you really want that."

"Hey!" I almost shout. "I'm not a twink!"

"Oh honey," Sasha says in a way that makes me think she pities me. "You're a pure bottom if I've ever seen one."

I feel my face and neck go red as she and Frank laugh at me, the one difference between the two how my best friend kisses me lightly on the temple to show me he's just joking around. Or at least I hope he is...

"Okay," Sasha suddenly claps her hands together, startling me. "I was told that I'm going to be pranking someone tonight, is it just the usual deal?"

"Yep, and his name is Bob. Bob B-something, maybe Brian or Brike or something, he could be Bob the fucking Builder for all I know." Frank says.

"Alright awesome, and what did he do?" She folds her fingers together and rests her elbows her knees, her chin on her hands. She looks at Frank excitedly as if this is her favorite thing to do in the world.

"Cheated on Gee's friend Lindsey."

"That fucker!" Sasha yells, slamming her hand down on the black coffee table in front of her. "That girl is awesome, I remember her coming to one of Gee's shows once."

"Yeah exactly, so I got the spray paint and you've got the distraction, right?" Frank asks, his tone completely serious, almost businesslike.

"Of course," She says, same attitude toward the planning process as my friend. "And this twink?"

"He sprays with me." He answers, not seeming to mind at all that Sasha keeps calling me a bottom.

"Deal." She reaches her hand out and shakes Frank's hand and then mine.

"Let's drive."

~~~~~

Ten minutes and a new layer of bright red blush on Sasha's high cheekbones later, we're in Frank's truck backing out of the parking spot quickly. It's already almost eleven and I can't help but yawn as my new favorite drag queen accidentally bumps me with her elbow while shifting into a position that makes it so that her thong isn't completely in her ass. Given my quite seat between her and Frank I try not to move so as to not cause an awkward "oh whoops I just touched your fake boobs" or "wow look at that, I bumped you and you accidentally drove off the road" moment.

We drive for a little less than twenty minutes before finally stopping at the side of a long empty road. At first I'm confused as to why we're stopping in a place where there aren't any houses around but then realize that that must be the point: so we can't get our license plate identified. Frank switches off the truck and looks over at me with a smile that I'm pretty sure is nervous but could also be devious, my mind isn't quite up to par right now with all the confusion and exhaustion I'm experiencing.

"You bring the bag?" He says, looking past me and at Sasha. I switch my line of sight over to her as she pulls a large black drawstring backpack out from the floor of the truck. "Awesome."

Frank smirks before getting out of the car and going to grab the paint cans. I slip out through his open door and sneak over to his side, tapping him on the shoulder. He turns around after a moment and looks at me.

"Hey," I say, trying to figure out how to word my question with all the nerves twisting my stomach. "So what exactly did you mean by he sprays with me?"

"Oh right," He says, still looking at me as the black bag is thrown and lands on his shoulder. He then turns and starts placing the paint in the bag gently so as to not make any noise. "You'll be spraying some art on the side of his house with me. That's what I always do as Sasha distracts the victim."

"Victim?" I question, cocking an eyebrow at him.

"Yep. Believe me, victim is accurate."

I stand behind him as he turns all his attention to gathering the cans in the black bag and cross my arms over my chest. Sasha walks over to me slowly, impressively steady in her red stilettos on the rocky road.

"You ready?" She asks quietly but still with an excited edge to her voice.

"Possibly." I say, deciding to just tell her the truth.

"Oh Dan," She hits my arm with her hand lightly. "You'll be great. You don't even have the hard part!"

"I'm guessing you do?" I rub my arms up and down in an attempt to warm them due to the cool autumn weather.

"You know it! I'm the one who has to distract the dick. Quite literally too." She wiggles her eyebrows and winks at me playfully as I widen my eyes.

"Wait you have to fuck him?"

"No, not fuck him. But I do have to at least get him off, it's the best kind of distraction for the guy, he won't expect a thing."

I hum in approval. "That's a good plan."

"Don't tell that to me," She says before nodding toward Frank who's swinging the now full bag on his back. "He's the one who created it."

"Damn." I mutter while turning around to face my best friend.

"Let's go fuck this guy up." He says, an evil grin on his face that makes me grow one as well.

"Let's go."

~~~~~

We walk down the road for two minutes before arriving at Bob's house, a small white cottage with an even smaller front yard. Thankfully there's a car in the driveway but no one outside in any of the yards near his so Frank and I immediately sneak over to the left side of his house, standing still with our backs against the wall. After a minute we decide that it's safe to peek around the edge of the house to watch Sasha approach the door.

I see her start staggering toward the porch, almost breaking her ankles in the process until she finally grabs the white post supporting the front part of the roof. She then trips up the steps and clumsily presses the doorbell twice before standing in a position that looks both very uncomfortable and like Frank when he gets wasted.

After a moment a blond man who I assume is maybe twenty years old answers the door and looks her up and down before she speaks.

"I'm here for a B-Bo-Bob B-something?" She says and I watch his small smirk grow into a grin.

"Bob Bryar?" I hear him say in a disgusting deep voice that I can't imagine Lindsey could have been attracted to in any way.

"Yup." She says, popping the p loudly.

"Well that's me."

"Goooooood, can I co-come in big booooy?" Sasha asks, almost falling over on him while placing her hand on his chest. I have to force a laugh back and cover my mouth with my hand as he places his hand on her waist and guides her in.

"She in?" Frank whispers behind me, making me jump.

"Yep, she's good."

"Yeah." He smiles as he slips his bag off and sets it on the ground lightly.

I watch as he opens up the bag and then looks up at the flat white wall in front of us, thinking deeply about something. After a moment he pulls out the green can and throws it over to me.

"Paint the bottom half green, I'm gonna do the top blue and purple." He tells me quickly after I catch the can with shaking hands, although I don't know if they're shaking because of the crime we're committing or the cold.

"Okay." I snap the cap off the paint and reveal the spout and walk up to the wall. I stand there and stare at it, thinking about how much trouble I'll get in if we're caught, how this would go on my permanent record, how my mother would kill me. And then I start spraying.

Once I start I find it difficult to stop, the feeling of wrecking something, destroying something, defacing it with the picture we're going to paint fueling me and my newfound love for creating. I feel a large grin grow on my face as Frank steps next to my kneeling form and starts spraying with the blue can, purple in his left hand. He notices my excitement and bumps my head with his hip, causing me to look up at him and his smile.

"Enjoying yourself down there?" He asks me quietly.

"Absolutely."

I spray the green up three feet and across four as Frank paints the main area of the top blue with purple splotches near the top. I watch as he bites his lip in concentration, making some parts of the purple spots darker than other. Suddenly he stops and runs behind me to the bag again.

"Make some white clouds like my purple ones up at the top I'm gonna make figures on your grass with the black." He whispers to me.

"Alright."

He jogs back over to me and throws the white can over. I stand and open the can but right once I finish shaking, I hear a noise.

Frank freezes next to me and puts his finger over his lips to tell me to be quiet. I nod and listen for the noise again with wide eyes. We stand in silence for another minute before the noise sounds again.

And then I realize that I know that sound: it's a moan.

Frank sighs in relief next to me and I raise my eyebrows at him. He looks over at me and mouths Sasha's name quickly before pointing to the window two feet away from him. I nod and then blow a long breath out of my mouth.

He starts spraying, crouching next to me and I reach up to the top of the mural, starting to create new clouds in the fake sky. I look down every once in a while and watch his hand, trying to figure out what he's creating until he finally steps back and runs over to his bag again, revealing the two figures obviously fucking in the middle of the hill I created. He comes back with the yellow can and starts creating like patches of flowers near them as I fight back a laugh at the painting now on the side of this fucker's house.

After another three minutes and Frank drawing the trunks of three trees and several other figures walking by the people in what I now assume is a park, he throws the green can at me again and tells me to spray the leaves on the trees. I abide by his request as he starts creating black buildings that reach into the blue sky, white windows squares on the sides.

Once I finish the cartoony green trees I step back and throw my can in the bag before walking up behind Frank who's shaking our last can: red. He snatches the cap off the top and crouches down, slowly releasing the paint from the can in a way that is so artistic that I'd bet even Gerard would be bowing down to him in this moment.

He sprays the red on the wall in long flowing script that I'm not able to read until he ends with a period on the far right side of the mural.

Cheating Leads to Sadness; Sadness Leads to Damage.

Frank gets up and stares at the mural with his hands on his hips, can discarded on the ground behind him. The message goes from the top of the left hill, swoops down below the couple, and ends on the top of the right hill, the cursive standing out over the green grass. He takes out his phone and quickly takes a picture with a smirk on his face before pocketing it again and hurriedly packing up all the cans in the black bag.

The moment he pulls the bag on his back we hear a blood curdling scream from inside the house and then suddenly the front door of the house slamming open. I look over at Frank with wide eyes and bolt out of the yard with him by my side, only looking back to see Sasha coming behind us, stilettos in hand and a huge smile on her face.

"I snapped it!" She screams as we run faster than I've ever gone before.

"Snapped what?" Frank yells back to her.

"His dick, honey! His fucking dick!"


	9. More Guys In Drag

I practically keel over once I make it to Frank's truck, not used to sprinting at least six hundred meters as opposed to the usual one hundred from practices. I bend over and rest my hands on my knees, my breathing labored and coming out in harsh gasps that hurt my chest. I hear Frank and Sasha doing the same next to me and I stare at my worn sneakers, not wanting to use the seemingly insurmountable amount of effort that's require to straighten my body. I eventually stand back up once I hear Frank's scratchy voice above me.

"You actually snapped his dick?" He asks, shaking his head at his second favorite drag queen (the one he bones constantly obviously being his absolute) in disbelief.

"You know it, Frankie," She says, winking at him. He pales and I can feel my stomach turn, making me wrap my arms around my torso in fear of puking all down her most likely quite expensive lingerie. I look over as she mimes snapping him in half and have to press my hand against my now closed mouth, feeling the bile raise in my throat.

"You okay there, Dan?" Frank asks me, setting his hand on my shoulder lightly, rubbing his fingers against me in a circular pattern. I nod and he drops his hand down, trailing it down my arm before linking his hand with mine, curling his fingertips around the side of my palm. "You did a great job tagging."

I look at him with my eyebrows furrowed together, confused by the term. He rolls his eyes in a way that I'm pretty sure is at himself before answering my most likely quite idiotic question. "Sorry, of course you don't know what tagging is. All you do is play with balls in your bedroom all day." I glare at him, annoyed by his reference to a ball other than the football I toss up in the air when I'm stressed. "It's basically just graffiti that you spray on buildings. I do it a lot, Gee taught me. He doesn't do it though, well not technically. I mean he gets payed to do it. He always lets me spray the basic figures and then paints all the details in. Our style has given him so many clients, street meets class."

Frank releases my hand and links his fingers together before looking down at them with a smile, no doubt imagining one of the hands as Gerard's. Sasha smiles at him warmly, her hands pressed against her cheeks.

"Oh you god you guys are so cute!" She says suddenly, her smile widening at her drag queen friend's boyfriend. Frank shifts his gaze away from his hands over to her excited face with a small smile gracing his lips.

"Thanks," He mumbles before undoing and clapping his hands together. "We should really get out of here before the police arrive which they no doubt will considering some dude just got his dick snapped."

He reaches behind himself and opens the driver's side door, looking over at me with quickly raised eyebrows. I roll my eyes at his ridiculous gesture as he moves toward the truck but right before he gets in Sasha reaches out and grabs his shoulder. He looks over at her, confused before she pulls him away, walking up and sitting in the seat herself.

"You look exhausted, you had school and then did the tagging and just I don't want to die because of you falling asleep at the wheel but also I bet Gee wouldn't appreciate me letting you drive the whole night." She smiles at him and closes the door and continues out of the open window. "Get in the back, take a nap."

Frank nods at her and then grabs my hand, pulling me around the other side of the vehicle quickly. I can feel his weariness in the weakness of the grip he has on my hand and open the door for him before he gets the chance. He gives me a tired smile and kisses the side of my head, right next to my eye, gratefully before jumping in the back.

I slide in after him and see his already curled up form, head resting against the small side window. I smile and tap his shoulder. He turns his head to look at me and opens his eyes. I take the black backpack that we used for the spray paint and dump all the cans on the floor before rolling it up and using it to prop my head up, lying down and hitting my chest. Frank gets the message and lies down so his back is against the seat backs and head resting on my chest as I wrap my arm around his back, my hand resting on his hip. He sighs contentedly and nuzzles his cheek into the leather of my jacket, looking up at me.

"Thanks, Dan." He whispers as Sasha starts the truck.

"You're welcome." I breathe back and feel him lift his leg up and set in between mine in the way I'm sure he does tok Gerard every night. "Goodnight."

I fall asleep right away.

~~~~~

I awake with a terrible taste in my mouth and my hand under someone's shirt. A loud alarm is going off that severely annoys me as I groggily open my eyes. The skin under my fingertips starts moving, shifting and I can feel pressure be taken off my legs, not seeing it because of the blurriness in my eyes.

"Dan?" I hear from right below my chin before feeling a tap on my shoulder.

"Yeah?" I push myself up on the elbow that isn't pressed between them and I think a seat to see the person who I'm still having a difficult time identifying. Once I see Frank's signature black haircut though I quickly take my hand out from inside his shirt where it had been resting on the line of his spine near his shoulders. "Sorry."

"It's fine." He says, leaving his chin pressing down into my chest. "Hey do you know what time it is?"

Only then do I notice that the alarm had stopped and feel my stomach drop. That was probably a school alarm. I reach into my jacket pocket, somehow managing to elbow Frank in the face in the process, and pull my phone out. Turning it on, I see the time 7:43 and start panicking.

"Shit it's almost 8:00, Frank!" I exclaim, knowing that we have to be at school in seventeen minutes or we'll get tardies and most likely matching detention slips.

"What? Oh my god but we're wearing clothes with paint on them! We can't go in these!" He yells, making me look down to see the white and green splotches on my t shirt. "We'll get caught by the cops!"

"Well what else can we do? We're in a parking lot, I didn't bring my bag, I don't even know how the hell we got here!" I tell him, pulling at my hair roughly.

Frank looks out the truck window and a smirk appears on his face, banishing his panicked frown to spend its time on mine.

"Sasha has clothes."

~~~~~

"You're kidding me."

Frank chews on his lip causally next to me at Sasha's bedroom door, me leaning against the doorjamb.

"Do we really have any other choice?" He asks me, swinging his gaze over to me lazily. I just look at him with a straight face, making him smirk slightly before looking back into the room that our drag queen friend had disappeared into. "And I bet she still has some guy clothes or something we could wear, stop worrying so much."

I cross my arms over my chest and push a large amount of air out of my nose in frustration, the sound bearing a strong resemblance to the llamas I used to see at the zoo when I was little. "Fine."

I lean against Frank slightly as we wait for Sasha to come back with what she called the most perfect outfits in the world. He pulls out his phone and looks down at the time before yelling for her to hurry up.

"I've got them right here for you darlings, come in!" She responds loudly, causing me to jump at her low and slightly nasally voice. I walk in at as slow a pace as I can manage with my best friend pushing me from behind before gasping when I see the clothes laid out on the end of a gold four post bed. "Get in them quick, you have to go!" She claps her hands excitedly as Frank sighs and goes to grab part of the outfit in front of him and I'm too freaked out to even move.

In front of me is a leather miniskirt. A black. Leather. Miniskirt. Laid out underneath it is a pair of fishnet stockings and two small heeled camo sandals. Sasha has paired it with a luckily loose camo tank top that I'll be able to mostly cover up with my leather jacket. Frank though doesn't look so lucky with a tight strapless denim dress that ends just above his knee and patterned pins on the right breast all displaying different superhero symbols. The only other part of the outfit are a pair of high heeled and open toed black converse.

"Come on Dan, we have to go." Frank says, elbowing me in the side. I groan and then pull my paint stained shirt off over my head quickly, following my friend's obedient lead.

Two minutes later we're both dressed and being groomed by Sasha in front of a long mirror hanging on the door of her bathroom.

"So you don't have any masculine clothes?" Frank asks her as she messes up his hair before fixing the fringe, leaving the top and sides slightly sloppy.

"Oh I do but they're all my husband's and I can't let you take those to your school." She says casually, moving onto perfecting my brown mop of hair.

"Why not?" I exclaim, seriously pissed by the fact that I could be wearing pants right now.

"Because you're playing his team today."

I snap my head around to stare at Sasha, much to her irritation. She jerks my head back around so she can finish straightening my curly hair.

"Coach Biersack?" I ask, jaw dropped to the ground as she nods with a smile.

"Yep, that's the hubby. He's hot isn't he?"

I blush bright red as I think of my slightly inappropriate thoughts I had when first meeting him.

"Yeah definitely." Frank agrees, saving my ass without knowing it.

"Okay you boys better get going." Sasha says before leaning down from her high heel enhanced height and placing a kiss on the tops of both of our heads. Frank smiles up at her before starting out of the room quickly, knowing that she'll understand his rushing for school.

"Bye Sash!" He yells and waves back at her as I trail behind him. "I'll say hey to your husband for you!" 

He opens the door and immediately sprints down the stairs to his truck, me failing to catch up to him until I'm slamming my body into the passenger side door. I quickly pull it open and jump in to find Frank pulling the top of his dress up on his chest, the clothing tape he had to use not quite working when he's running. I look down at my fishnet- clad legs one more time before sighing and looking over at my smirking friend.

"Let's get this over with." I say nervously. He puts his key in the ignition and turns it, making the engine purr loudly.

"Come on, Dan." He says mockingly, pulling out of the parking lot at exactly 7:56 in the morning. "This will be fun."

~~~~~

I run through the door of my English class right before Frank and the bell. Stumbling slightly in my heels, I walk over to my seat with him and slide into it, everyone's eyes following us across the room. Luckily the teacher isn't behind his desk yet, he has quite the pair of wandering eyes.

Once sat Frank grabs his notebook out of his backpack and hands me a piece of paper and pencil so I won't be entirely screwed when Mr. McCracken comes along which can't be fully prevented as I never was able to finish that assignment. I can feel my peers' eyes boring into the back of my head and therefore raise both hands along with their middle fingers because well I'm in drag and not willing to deal with this shit right now.

A moment later though my scummy teacher walks in a coffee stained sweatshirt and track pants, carrying his black briefcase in his left hand, his right already preoccupied with the task of trying to fix his greasy black hair so he at least looks a little bit more presentable than the overflowing trash can in the courtyard.

"Alright class, how are you?" He slurs before lazily dropping the case on his desk at the front of the classroom and rubbing his eyes with the tips of his nicotine stained fingers. He slowly opens his eyes as a few suck ups answer him and ask how he is. His gaze is immediately drawn to Frank in his strapless dress and he raises his eyebrows with a slight smirk. Ignoring the other students, he walks up to Frank's end of our table and looks him up and down in a way that would definitely lead to other non consensual activities if we weren't in school right now. "Thinking of being a drag queen are we, Iero?"

I can feel Frank start to shake slightly and place my hand on his leg under the table, rubbing his knee lightly with the pads of my fingers in an effort to calm him down. He balls his hand into a fist before forcing a clearly aggravated smile onto his thin lips. "It's really only a one time thing, Mr. McCracken."

"Good to know, Frank." He's about to turn away when he looks over to me and sees my tight leather skirt, making a blush rise on my cheeks and his smirk grow. "But is this only a one time thing for you as well, Howell?"

"Yep, I just had to throw something on this morning, sir."

"And you went for that?" He raises his eyebrows and looks me up and down the same way he had done to Frank. "Stay after class boys."

I feel Frank tense under my palm and rub my hand up and down his leg to try to calm his high strung nerves. He looks over at me with wide eyes and parted lips, obviously terrified of the idea of spending time alone with McCracken even if I'll be there too. I whisper words of comfort at him but stop when our names are suddenly called from the front of the room.

"Or would you two rather that we talk now?" The teacher says, turning away from the chalkboard where he had been writing the notebook prompt with a broken piece of yellow chalk. "Out in the hall."

I slowly stand and walk to the classroom door that he's pointing toward, Frank stumbling over his nerves behind me. I hear McCracken tell the class to talk quietly until he comes back before walking over to us in the hallway.

Frank latches his hand onto my forearm tightly as the disgusting teacher closes the door, walking toward us so we back into the hallway more, effectively hiding us from the view of our classmates. I gulp as he lets his terrifying smile grow on his face. I wouldn't want to be cornered by him if he was our age, let alone a thirty year old him pushing Frank and I into the corner of the dark third floor hallway.

"So boys," He reaches out and presses his hand against the lockers in front of us, his chest facing us as we press our backs into the connecting walls. He smiles with his yellow tipped teeth as Frank presses closer to me. "What's up with the clothes? Are you just trying to tempt me?"

I can feel my stomach drop to the floor as he reaches out and brushes Frank's fringe out of his eyes and my friend doesn't do anything about it. He simply shuts his eyes tightly and lets the older man play with his hair in a way that I'm sure could get him fired. I open my mouth to tell him to stop touching him but find myself silenced as the teacher moves his hand from Frank's face to my arm. He slowly trails it down to my hip and pinches the miniskirt between his fat fingers.

"Leather?" He looks up at me mischievously while letting his hand fall to the bottom of my skirt to feel the fishnets directly below the hem of the garment. "Classy, Howell."

I glare at him as he brushes his fingers across my inner thigh and am just about to slap him in the face before he quickly extracts his hand.

"Do look this good tomorrow, will you boys? You were both already hot, but damn look now." He says before turning and heading back to his classroom but soon stops and looks back at us over his shoulder. "Do come in soon and don't tell anyone about this, you wouldn't want to fail English would you?"

I can feel his smirk as I stand with my best friend attached to my side, chin dropped and anger bubbling in my stomach. I watch as Mr. McCracken steps back into the classroom with a semi hard on that I can just barely see in his sweatpants.

Suddenly I hear a thud and look down to see Frank curled up on the floor at my feet. I crouch and put my arm around him, letting him lean over and rest his face on my shoulder, tears sliding down my leather jacket. I can't help but think about how odd we must look, two teenage boys in drag crying in the corner of a school hallway but am snapped out of my thoughts when Frank starts choking words out into my shoulder.

"H-he touched me." He stutters and lets his tears free, shuddering as I rub his back with my palms, applying pressure on his shaking shoulders. I let him place his legs on either side of me and I lay mine flat underneath his bent leg.

"I know, Frankie, I know." I whisper into his ear and place a kiss behind it. We sit in silence for a minute or so as I slowly massage his shoulders and temples. Once he stops crying I lift his head up, two fingers pushing up his chin softly. "But now, Frankie we need to go in there and show him that we're strong. That he can't just touch us and push us around. Okay?" He wipes his tears and nods. I give him a soft smile. "Come on."

I stand up and extend my hand to help him off the ground which he reaches up and grabs, balancing himself on his heels and pulling himself up on his feet. He wipes his cheeks dry with the backs of his hands and quickly straightens out his dress so it's not falling down his chest and crinkling around his butt. I pull on my tank top as he does his adjustments to make sure it stays loose and tug at the miniskirt in an effort to make it cover where the teacher had touched me.

"Ready?" I ask him, a weakly determined look on my face as his hazel eyes look into mine.

"Yeah."

~~~~~

Both Frank and I are shaken up for the rest of the school day. Neither of us could concentrate in the thirty minutes of English we attended much to McCracken's surprise. We were supposed to write an essay on how Shakespeare's plays connect to present day life, an assignment I would normally be able to finish in ten minutes but even Frank wasn't able to finish his third paragraph.

We ate lunch together but simply chew on our sandwiches in silence, not able to think of anything to talk about, only cry over. We don't leave school though despite how much we want to, I mean two guys walking around in drag would surely be noticed if walking off school property.

People stared at us the whole day, shocked by the leather and denim we're sporting and honestly I don't know if I can take anymore today. But of course as I'm walking to the locker room I just have to run into Aria, literally.

"Oh I'm sorry!" I say, somehow managing to keep myself steady and not knock her to the ground despite the dark brown stilettos she's sporting.

"Watch were you're goin-" She looks up from her top, checking for any Starbucks coffee stains that I could have caused, and almost chokes. "Dan?" She exclaims while inspecting my face with squinting eyes and an open mouth. "What the fuck?"

She looks me up and down as I pull my keys out of my backpack and start spinning the key around my finger.

"Are you wearing a fucking miniskirt?" Aria spits at my face, seemingly disgusted by the presence of Sasha's clothes on my male body.

"Yep," I reply, popping the p and smiling at her. She cocks an eyebrow at me and I can actually see her cheeks heat with anger. "It's only for today, I'm doing it for a transgender supportive charity."

That is probably the only lie that I have ever felt bad about telling.

"Really?" She asks, her face softening slightly at the mention of the transgender community which I can't help but question but then hardening again, only a split second of weakness.

"Yep," I prepare myself for pulling a full explanation straight out of my ass. "Basically guys dress in drag and then take pictures and send them to the charity and every picture is equal to three dollars. Frank is doing it too, you can ask him about it."

"Oh okay," She gives me a puzzled smile. "Well have fun at practice, do well against the Knights or whoever they are."

I nod and give her a smile that I hope looks genuine before she gets up on her toes and plants a kiss on the tip of my nose, blushing red.

"Bye, Dan."

I wave goodbye as she walks away, shocked by her sudden act of affection, and then start off to the field again, not quite ready to face a homophobic coach in drag but oh well. At least I know his friend Biersack is married to the drag queen I got this miniskirt from.

Yeah, that should get me through the scrimmage.


	10. Football Practice Again

"I do not want to play these guys tonight." I hear PJ complain from the row of lockers next to mine. "They crushed us the other day."

"That was only because Dan sucked ass." Another one of my teammates pipes up as I start pulling my practice jersey over the bulky shoulder pads gracing my body. I roll my eyes and leave it hung around my neck, walking out of my empty row and over to the filled one containing half of my team.

"Thanks guys, really appreciate that." Most of the guys look over once they hear my voice, a few not being able to due to their pants only being halfway up their thighs or the terrible purple jersey covering their eyes, temporarily blocking me from sight.

"Well I mean it's obvious you weren't exactly in your prime..." Mason says while pulling his Eminem shirt off. "What were you so distracted by anyway?"

"N-nothing," I attempt to give him a smooth answer but utterly fail as usual. "Nothing was distracting me, it was just an off day for me. We all have them, Mase." I cross my arms over my chest, hoping that he'll believe my bullshit.

"I bet it was that faggot being there, right Howell?" Tyler yells, his voice as loud as his purple hair. I can feel my hands ball into fists before I release the stress and force an apparently convincing smile.

"Nah, I was just thinking about Aria. Her ass is so fucking great." I say, watching all my teammates smirk at the mention of my girlfriend. "It didn't have anything to do with Frank." I wave goodbye to the guys, turning to go back and finish putting my uniform on but am suddenly stopped by a deep voice.

"I'm surprised you haven't fucked Iero yet, Howell."

I spin around and sweep my eyes back to see Zack picking his helmet up from the wooden bench in the middle of the aisle. He lifts his eyes to meet mine and I can feel his glare pierce my retinas.

"I mean with you guys running off together after practice the day after he got kicked off? It's so obvious it's almost painful."

"So obvious that it's not true? I don't have a thing with Frank, Zack. Maybe you're just confusing your sex life with mine."

And to the sound of fifteen laughing teenage boys, I grab my uniform and take it to the bathroom.

~~~~~

By the time I'm out of the locker room the other team has already arrived. The last few team members are filing out of the school bus lugging the large mesh sacks of footballs on their backs as I start my two laps around the field that only half of my team seems to have started.

Dropping my helmet and starting to pump my arms, I look around at all the unfamiliar teenagers around me. Some of the other team's players are stretching on the end line closest to the parking lot, seven of them all lined up trying to touch their toes. I don't see the captain though so I continue turning my head to search for the black haired player when I suddenly crash into something hard and tumble to the ground, my heavy equipment making it difficult to lift my arm up to shield my eyes from the sun.

I almost shit myself when I identify that hard object as the captain.

And not the type of hard I'd love to identify him as.

"Oh my god I'm so sorry!" He reaches out and grabs my hands in his, digs his heels into the ground, and pulls me up as I push up with my own cleats. After a bit of struggling I'm back on my feet and brushing the backs of my legs off with my hands quickly. I can feel my blush growing along with my regret for leaving my helmet behind and look down at my feet. I bring my eyes back up though when he starts speaking again in a worried tone. "Are you alright, Dan?"

"Y-yeah I'm fine." A smile grows on my face as I take in the fact that he remembers my name. Did I actually make an impression on him? More than he made on me? No... I bet he's just really good with remembering names I mean I've never been that great or anythin-

"You sure? You seem to be spacing out, did you hit your he-" Phil says, interrupting my thoughts with a hand on my shoulder.

"No, no, no, I'm fine, believe me I'm fine." I give him a smile before putting both my thumbs up in front of his still concerned face.

"Okay" Phil says, obviously not quite sure whether I'm telling him the truth or not. "Well do you wanna run the rest of your laps together? Or are you not willing to 'socialize with the enemy' like all my team mates?" He laughs, revealing the most beautiful smile I have ever seen.

"I would love to run with you, dear Phillip." I say before bowing dramatically and smirking smugly once I straighten up again. I see him take his hand away from his mouth, giggling adorably, breaking every goddamn stereotype about football players in the space of three point six four seconds. Once he stops I step next to him and turn in the direction I came and put a smile on my face. "Hip hip, Phillip. We really must be going now."

I hear Phil laugh beside me as I start to jog down the end line, him catching up a few moments later with his arms pumping in a way that suggests a history with his school's track team. His body works in an almost mechanical way as we slowly move along the outside of the field, his legs and arms completely synchronized in their smooth motions. It takes all my resistance not to gawk at his perfect form as we run along the outskirts of the field, our team mates most likely staring at their two captains actually getting along unlike all the ones before us. Hopefully Zack won't start to bother me about Phil now, I mean he's already convinced (and not wrong) that I'm gay. He better not mess this up for me or I swear I'll kill him.

"Alright men, huddle up!" I hear Coach Biersack yell, his hands cupped around his mouth as he stands next to my slightly irritated coach. I can't deny that seeing the slight scowl on his face makes me smile. Phil, not realizing that I'm a terrible person, thinks I'm smiling at him and returns the unintended gesture. We jog toward the huge mass of players in their differing jerseys. It's actually pretty amazing how easily they're able to separate by team, it's almost split right down the half with Coach Biersack smiling at his side while Samstrung glowers at his team of purple and yellow wasps. I wonder how he's already managed to get pissed off.

Phil stops next to me, placing his hands on his hips while intently waiting on our coaches' next words. Given his generally friendly attitude I really shouldn't be as surprised as I am that he hasn't decided to join in on the segregated huddle but I still find myself smiling softly at the ground due to his presence. He breathes in time with me, although I'm slightly winded by our warm up jogging, I've never been the most fit player just a hard working one. Phil is obviously a gifted athlete though, his breathing is completely even.

"After the scrimmage we had last time we decided that we should just go back to the basics." Coach Samstrung says, Biersack smiling at us with his arms swinging slightly, most likely trying to loosen up his shoulders. "So for the next couple practices we'll be doing drills, each day aimed toward a different part of your body or skill. We'll be starting with legs today which will continue into next week with running and endurance. Okay?"

"Okay," Coach Biersack claps his hands together loudly, effectively making half my team jump while Phil just stares at them, obviously amused by the fright that none of his teammates felt. "Let's get going, everyone needs a partner. Once you pick yours get to your own station, there're enough things for everyone to have something to do so I better not hear any excuses!" After another booming clap we're dismissed and my head is turning toward the tall Killingly player next to me. We meet eyes and I smile at him, my heart lifting as I begin to discover the true beauty of the blue orbs.

"Be my partner, Dan?" He asks, his hands kneading each other at his navel. 

"Yeah sure, what d'you want to do first?" He quickly grabs my elbow and starts sprinting off to left end of the field where there are three stacks of large orange cones. I stumble behind him, his sprinting about ten times faster than mine, and eventually have to pull on his arm to get him to slow down a bit. When he sees how much I'm struggling he stops and lets go of my arm, leaving red marks where his fingers had clenched onto my muscle. His eyebrows furrow and his eyes widen in concern.

"I'm so sorry, Dan! Are you alright? Let's just walk the rest of the way oh my god-"

"Phil, I'm fine don't worry." I interrupt his quick words, already starting a fast jog toward the cones again. 

"Okay... but if your arm starts hurting or anything tell me, I can help bandage it and stuff. I really am sorry, I didn't realize, I promise I would never hurt you on purpose. Oh god you probably hate me now..." He mumbles as we stop at the end line.

"I know you didn't mean to Phil, believe me. It's all good." I wave my hands in front of me, hopefully reassuring him.

"O-okay. Let's get going with the cones then." He says while starting to lift the top cone of the stack. 

I smile and join him in separating the cones and placing them around us on the grass. After distributing the fifteen cones I look up at Phil and see that he's started moving them toward the end line.

"Just put them in a line on the end line, about a foot in between so we can run between them." He tells me once he sees that I'm looking up at him. I nod and follow his directions as he starts to grab a cone with his lean hands. I notice that he's been smiling this whole time, the entirety of the practice well except for when he thought he'd hurt me. I study him as we prepare for our drills of choice. His grin doesn't once leave his face. I swear he must be Chris Traeger in disguise or something.

"So just some sprints through first? Then we could try karaoke step and shit?" I suggest as we both straighten up after placing our last cones. 

"Yeah sure sounds good." Phil gives me two thumbs up before starting his first round of sprints, his feet carrying him quickly through the curved path. I watch as he swerves between the cones, amazed by how smoothly he moves. His torso bends and I can see his tight muscles contract beneath his white and purple practice jersey as he finishes his run through the cones and I start mine.

As we go through our drills I can't help but feel insecure with Phil watching me, even if not as intently as I'm watching him. He's just the model athlete, completely deserving of the role of team captain while I basically just sucked up to Coach to secure my spot. But hey at least I didn't suck him off like that freshman did with his coach to make it onto the varsity swim team in the next town over last year. I mean I hate Coach Samstrung but that doesn't mean I want him arrested, then when he would get out he'd murder me and my whole family. And that would first of all be a terrible way to go out and second of all would make a great film and I do not want my death to become the final killing in a horror movie. 

I just can't help but feel inferior to my athletically gifted partner as he lifts the seventy five pound barbells that no one on my team has been able to work with in the last three years. And well I don't think anyone would blame me, it's just that I've been working toward that weight since freshman year and even now I'm only at sixty-five. And then Phil is just able to come in and lift it like it's nothing...

"Hey, great job today, Dan!" Phil yells to me while wiping sweat off his forehead with the back of his hand. I give him a small smile before putting my hand up for a high five as he approaches me.

"Thanks man you too!" He grins and laces his fingers through mine, shaking my hand back and forth in his before dropping it. I furrow my eyebrows together while shaking my head a bit, a smile still on my face.

"What?"

"The whole hand thing, what was that?"

"Oh it's nothing I just do that to my friends sometimes after a high five." He laughs before slapping me on the back and running toward the middle of the field where Coach Biersack has just blown his whistle. "Come on!" He yells back at me, me pick up my pace until I'm jogging next to him with a light blush gracing my cheeks. 

"Alright great job guys, hope you had fun with your teammates but next time you all need to work with someone on the opposite team like Dan and Phil did. They're your captains, see them as your leaders. Okay my team, be on the bus in fifteen minutes, Samstrung's men go change. Great practice, see you soon!" The tall coach waves goodbye, dismissing both the teams. My teammates scatter as the coaches make their way toward the benches where they've placed their large bags. I turn around toward the locker room but am stopped by a hand on my shoulder.

"Hey, see you next week?" Phil asks me with a (what could possibly be a nervous) grin. 

"Yeah, totally." 

"Awesome." He shakes my shoulder before letting go and slowly walking over toward Coach Biersack. I smile softly as I retreat to the locker room to change. I can't help but blush which I poorly attempt to hide as I enter the building. 

Once I'm in the disgusting area I grab my bag and bring it over to the showers. I quickly pull out my phone and turn it on to see one message:

You better fucking join us for dinner and tell us about this terribly obvious crush of yours Danny or I will cut you

And of course it's from Frank.


	11. Crossy Road Is My Savior

"You are actually pathetic."

I walk out of the school to hear Frank say, his arms crossed over his chest as he leans against his boyfriend's truck.

"I swear I'm gonna start calling you Heart Eye Howell if you keep this up. It's just sad." He shakes his head as I start to blush and walk over to swing my bags into the back of the pickup truck. Quickly slipping all the straps off my shoulders, I chuck my backpack and sport bag in the back and then get in myself. To my surprise, I see Frank climb in after me as Gerard starts the vehicle. 

"Hey no need to come back here and keep making fun of me." I say, raising my hands up in surrender. "I know I looked like an idiot, you don't need to tell me."

"I'm not here to bully you, Danny. It's just remember how you're my best friend and stuff? I think that allows me to sit back here with you."

"Yeah, I guess."

"And I kinda partially own this truck so." He adds while sitting down next to me, both of us with our backs against the cab of the blue pickup.

"True. So what's up with you?"

"Not a lot really, Gerard and I have just been watching Orange Is the New Black lately, it's pretty good. We're on season three and we only started last week so basically we're both trash and I fell asleep with my face in his crotch and popcorn all over my back." I laugh at him and tilt my head back to feel the wind blow through my hair as Gerard starts out of the parking lot. "Yeah, I'm pretty sure the popcorn was Gee's fault."

Suddenly Frank stands straight up next to me as we pull onto main street.

"Holy shit what the fuck are you doing?" I scream at him.

"Living an exciting life Dan, hold my legs!" He yells back at me, not once looking down while extending his arms out so they're parallel to the metal that he's standing on. I quickly wrap my arms around his legs and press my check against his calf, my legs scrambling to fold underneath me so I won't fall over and subsequently launch him off the moving vehicle and into a busy road. Honestly I don't think anyone wants to be taken out by a soccer mom with road rage. 

"I'm guessing you've started being an idiot lately then?" I say, raising my eyebrows at him as he looks down at me.

"I look like Jesus don't I?" He says, completely ignoring my remark. "Maybe I need to look a little more dead though." He rolls his eyes back in his head and sticks out his tongue. "How's this?" Although it doesn't really sound like actual words and more like "Hah heh?" given how his tongue is still limp.

"You are such a fucking moron, why am I friends with you?"I groan and hold him tighter against my chest.

"Because I'm actually really cool and you're trying to learn how to be as awesome as me but really you'll never be able to." Frank says, before reaching down and flashing me his middle finger.

"Oh shut up."

~~~~~

It only takes about ten minutes more of crippling anxiety to arrive at George's with the thankfully completely unharmed couple. Or well unharmed except for the insult that some old woman threw at Frank because of how he was apparently making her "ashamed to be an American" which then made him angry enough to start quickly spouting expletives. Thankfully I was able to keep him from jumping over onto her car.

"Hey Marina is working tonight right?" Frank asks Gerard while taking his hand and rubbing his thumb across the back of it.

"Yeah I think he got back from Helena's yesterday or something. They went to a Queen concert together the other day and oh my god they were both so fucking excited, I drove Marina to the train station last week and she was bouncing in her seat the entire time. I think she got a taxi yesterday though because she thought I'd done enough for her or something."

"It's so awesome that your grandmothers are so close."

"Yeah it's just sad that it took my grandfather dying to start the relationship."

Last year Gerard moved after his grandpa Roman died of brain cancer. He hadn't been to the doctor in over seven years and had always been the kind of person who would deny help from anyone so Helena was never able to force him to make an appointment. One day three months before his death though Roman collapsed in the middle of the living room of his and Helena's cottage. He was carted to the hospital and then diagnosed with critical brain cancer, in fact a tumor had been growing in his brain for over four years but quite slowly, apparently Roman was some kind of superhero. He was admitted to the hospital immediately and died only a month and a half later after being in a coma for three days and the doctors decided to shut down life support. 

Gerard had been deeply affected by his death, the man had practically raised him as his parents weren't able to take care of him and his brother until he had turned five. His parents had then been able to move back to Jersey after seven long years of having to work nonstop in Texas for a publishing company that had been paying them far too little for the immense amount of work they'd been doing.

Gerard moved away from his family soon after his grandfather's death. He had told them that he needed to escape the town as it held such a bad memory, he had to leave the thoughts of his grandfather's death behind him and he just couldn't while being a mile away from his home. So Donna and Donald discussed before helping him find the apartment that he now lives in with Frank. 

All his recent experiences had made him much less friendly and wear much more black out of mourning and therefore right once he'd come to our school he was shunned as the new freak. Fortunately Frank had always been one to be friends with the "freaks" and welcomed Gerard into his home. Frank's mother absolutely loved him right from the beginning, not at all judging him for the deep depression that he had just recently been diagnosed with by the psychotherapist his parents had been paying for him to go to.

After a few months of friendship Gerard had gotten even worse though, his self harming urges had started and he'd given in. He'd bought razors, he'd bought big sweatshirts, he'd attempted to overdose once. That's when Mrs Iero had suggested that Frank move into Gerard's apartment to take care of him. He'd of course jumped at the chance and delivered the contents of his closet to his friend's home that afternoon unbeknownst to Gerard's parents.

Their relationship at that point had simply been platonic and Frank slept on Gerard's couch for about three weeks. But that all changed once night when Frank had caught his friend burning himself with his hair straighteners and accidentally used his love as an incentive for Gerard to stop harming himself. In the shock of Frank telling him to stop because he loved him he'd stopped his destructive actions and kissed his friend of four months, effectively beginning their long time love affair.

From then on Frank slept in a bed: Gerard's.

They've been inseparable since, I mean they're holding hands in the middle of a restaurant, that takes guts even with a relative who'd certainly kick any homophobic ass bothering them.

"Okay, your waitress will be right over." A red haired young woman tells us as she gives us menus.

"Thank you." I tell her with a smile that she apparently takes as flirting given how she then flips her hair and winks. I then awkwardly blush as she walks away and Frank and Gerard start cackling across from me in their booth seat.

"Gay guys really do get all the straight girls don't they, Dan?" Gerard says, although with a few gaps in between the words because of how hard he's laughing.

"Yeah," Frank gasps, trying to get a word out in between his odd giggles. "He's dating one too, it's pretty amazing how straight he is for a homosexual."

"Wait what?" Gerard exclaims, his eyebrows raised after coughing for about three years in order to stop laughing. 

"Remember Aria? She's dating Danny now because he's the captain now."

"Oh shit that sucks." Gerard says while giving me a sympathetic look. "She was an actual demon."

"Yeah, I can't say she's my optimal partner but you know. It's not like I can date a guy or anything." I sigh.

"I don't know, that Phil guy seems to be pretty willing..." Frank says, smirking at me as he rubs his hand up and down his boyfriend's arm.

I groan and start to correct him but am suddenly interrupted by a bearded man at the end of the table.

"Hello I'm Jack, may I help yo-"

"Nope!" Marina runs over and hip checks him out of the way, stealing his pen in the process and pulling out her notepad. "That's my job."

"Oh my god, Marina." Gerard says, burying his face in his open hands.

"What?" She says while smoothing her hair down and fixing her glasses.

"You're seventy-two. Stop acting like you're seven."

"That's the only way to have fun. Now what do you wanna drink? I put in the wings and pizza order when I heard you were here."

"Three root beers please." I say before either of my friends can attempt to convince her to give them alcohol.

"Got it." She says, shoving her pen and pad in her waist apron and walking off.

"Ugh you suck." Frank says, glaring at me from across the table.

"Thanks," I shoot him a smile before looking over at the band corner where Panic! At the Disco had been performing last time I was here. "When do you think that Brendon kid is coming back?"

"I don't know, we can check the performance schedule on the way out though."

"Brendon? Is he that kid who sang about sex constantly when you came here last time?"

"Yup he was really good. In fact all the members of the band were great. I really liked that guitar player."

"Well yeah that's because he was one of the most adorable guys ever and you probably wanked off to the thought of little Ryan Ross playing his purple guitar."

"Oh my god shut up!"

~~~~~

"Honestly the pizza here is the best shit ever."

"I totally agree." Gerard says with his mouth partially filled with meat lover's pizza. I nod along with him.

"I'm pretty sure Phil is the tastiest thing to Dan though, do tell us about him, buddy!" Frank says with a bright smile.

"Well first of all fuck you. And second of all, we've only hung out for one practice so will you just leave me alone about him?"

"Never, Howell. Your crush is pathetic and I need to know all the details whether you want to share or not."

I groan and drag my hands down my face. "Fine. His name is Phil and he's the captain of the Killingly team and he has black hair and he's really great at football and his eyes are really pretty." I then give them two thumbs up before shoving a piece of Father Sarducci in my mouth.

"Okay... well that's a start." Frank says, obviously shocked that I responded. "I can't say I was actually expecting you to say anything but thanks I guess?"

"You're welcome because that's it for the rest of time." I say before dramatically standing up. "I have to go to the bathroom, please don't engage in disturbing public sex while I'm gone."

I then rush over to the bathroom, swing the door open, closed, and pull out my phone as I lock the door. I open up Crossy Road (not porn hub like everyone would expect) to play for the next couple of minutes. Sometimes Frank and Gerard just overwhelm me and for some reason my escape is always Crossy Road. So yeah apparently small animals hopping across locomotive filled streets are the only thing that can calm me down after interactions with my friends.

But hey I never said I was functional in public.

Or private.

My only friend is myself basically.

Ten roadkill filled minutes later I hear someone knock on the door and quickly shove my phone in my pocket in order to open the door for the person who most likely wishes the use the bathroom for the intended use. I open the door to see Frank standing there before he backs me back into the room. 

"Playing Crossy Road again?" He asks, his arms crossed but not seeming angry at all. "Yes, I do know that you play that game whenever we make you uncomfortable. Sorry about that by the way, I just really wanna know about this guy and stuff, you never show interest in anyone."

"Yeah I get it. It's just yeah he's great and I would love to be able to become at least friends with him, but that doesn't mean we're getting married or anything." I laugh softly, crossing my arms across my chest insecurely.

"Yeah I know, I hope you guys get together though, you already work well together and that's obviously a really important part of a relationship. Also just you two look absolutely adorable together so that'll be awesome."

"See I agree with those things but you're also talking about us being together as a thing that's actually surely going to happen and we really don't know." I say, looking down at my feet until Frank taps my arm and has me look back up at him.

"We can still hope though. Or at least you can. I'm just gonna stand by and hardcore ship you two, alright?" I smile and nod at him. "So believe me I'll always be here to help you with this shit, especially if you do end up together and you need to talk to someone about how great or awful your relationship is. It's important that you know that you can always rely on my for this stuff, and well anything else really."

"Thank you I appreciate that. But dude how did you know about my Crossy Road thing?"

"The app is always open on your phone and I can hear you cursing the alien thing under your breath all the time, it's not the most inconspicuous thing in the world."

"Yeah I guess." I laugh. 

"So you're oka-" He's suddenly interrupted by a hard knock on the door and yells, "There's a lot of gay sex happening in here I would not come in right now!"

I hear a muffled what the fuck before the person apparently leaves the hallway and I shift my line of sight from the door to Frank. "Dude."

"Come on we really should go, are you finished? Is the condom buried in the trash?"

"Oh shut up!"

~~~~~

"So babe, I heard something about gay sex in the bathroom?"

"Yeah your boyfriend decided to claim fucking for some reason, it wasn't me." I inform Gerard

"Yeah I figured, you don't really seem the type to casually tell people you're screwing someone even if it's true."

"Yeah very true."

I bounce around in the seat of the truck as we pull into the parking lot of my friends' apartment building to get their books for school. As Gerard parks and takes his keys out of the ignition I shift so that Frank can climb over me to get out of the truck. When he does I try to sink in the seat but he of course still pushes his nuts in his face, making me choke slightly.

I sit in the cab of the truck and listen to Muse on my iPhone as I wait for them to grab their class necessities so they can stay over at my house and leave straight to school in the morning. It only takes them maybe five minutes until they're down again, throwing their bags in the back, and jumping in next to me. We then of course go through an eventful drive as we always do with Gerard behind the wheel over to my house and quietly park on the road in front of my house.

Frank leaps out of the pickup to my right, me following close behind as Gerard takes his keys and slams his door closed. I grab my bags and quickly run up to my front door, looking through the window beside it first to see my mother's book club meeting on the couches.

"Oh fuck not again." I mutter while resting my head against the wood door.

"What is it?" Frank startles me, causing me to jump and hit my head hard against the door.

"The book club is here, I don't even know why. They normally only meet on Sundays. Oh god this is bad."

"What is?" Gerard asks, just coming up to us with his bag.

"Book club."

"What's so bad about a bunch of old ladies?"

"Oh, you'll see." I groan before taking out my key and unlocking the door slowly, already regretting bringing the couple over. I push the door open and hear all the women stop talking and can feel their gazes shift toward the doorway. My friends enter the house and I close and lock the door behind them, gritting my teeth as I prepare for the inevitable shit storm that's going to ensue once my mother and her friends identify Frank and Gerard.

"Hello Daniel, who have you brought home with you?" I hear my mother's shrill voice speak out from the living room and I look over after passing my friends in the doorway who are thankfully not showing any signs of their romantic relationship.

"Frank Iero and Gerard Way, Mom." I say, giving her a smile as I tilt my head to the side.

"Oh," She purses her lips, looking the two teenagers behind me up and down. "Welcome boys, why don't you head up to Daniel's room? He'll join you in a minute."

I look back at the two and see Gerard open his mouth but I quickly shake my head at him and point to the staircase on the other side of the room to tell him to just go up with Frank.

"Okay Mrs Howell, thank you for welcoming us." Frank says while going up and shaking her hand which she does with a disgusted look on her face that makes Gerard tense beside me.

"My pleasure, Franklin."

"Okay let's go Gee." Frank says, turning around and motioning for his boyfriend to follow him up to my room. I watch as they disappear up the stairs before my mother grabs my arm roughly and drags me out of view of her book club who's been completely silent since I entered the house.

"What the hell do you think you're doing bringing that scum in this house?" She hisses as I glare at her and rip my arm out of her grip.

"They're my friends, Mom. And I don't care what you say they're not leaving." She stares at me with widened eyes complete with dramatic gold eyeshadow that makes her look absolutely insane. "I'm going upstairs, have fun with your club."

I then rush off to my room, my bags on my shoulders. I run up the stairs as quickly as I can, needing to get back to my friends as soon as possible and slam my door open to find my friends sitting on my bed holding hands as Gerard whispers in his boyfriend's ear who has a small frown on his face.

"Guys, I am so sorry." I start, making Frank and Gerard look up and over at me as the latter wraps his arms around his boyfriend. "My mom is so terrible, I didn't think she'd be awake let alone meeting with her gossip group. I'm so sorry."

"It's fine, believe me." Frank says before giving me a smile and releasing himself from Gerard's embrace as he gets up off the bed. "We deal with that shit all the time, I just feel bad for you. You have to fucking live with that bitch."

"Yeah it's not fun." I say, laughing lightly while walking over to my bed and reaching under it to grab the blow up mattress and the sheets that the couple keeps here for the numerous nights they stay over by sneaking in my window at eleven thirty at night. There have been a surprising number of time that I've found them asleep on the mattress at the end of my bed, both wrapped up in the batman sheets.

I plug the pump into the wall and start inflating the bed as my friends place their bags on my filming chair. While walking over to get my pajamas they take their own out of their bags and start stripping to change into their superhero and comic strip pants. But suddenly I hear them start giggling and look over to see that they're staring at the small paintings of them on their ceiling that Gerard made.

And of course they're naked.

And fucking.

I still can't believe he put that on my goddamn ceiling.

"Dude I hate you so much." I say seriously to Gerard, making him start laughing at me and not just my ceiling art.

"Well I think it's great." Frank says, arm curled around Gerard's waist. I look down at my pajamas in my hands.

"Thanks, babe."

"Welcome."

I look back up at the same moment that they lightly kiss, creating a wonderfully awkward moment.

"Okay well I'm gonna sleep, please just don't make out all over my room please."

"Yeah yeah, just go to bed, Howell." Gerard says, wrapping his arm around his boyfriend's shoulders and kissing the side of his head, making the shorter of the two blush slightly, nuzzling against his neck.

"Okay..." I say, still hesitant about just falling asleep when they're in my room but begin putting on my sweatpants anyway.

"You're all good man, just relax, I'll make him control himself." Frank reassures me with a laugh.

"Alright." I walk over to my backpack next to staircase and take out my books from American History and Calculus as I only have my good classes tomorrow like advanced piano and computer programming.

"I'll wake you guys up in the morning, just you better actually get up when I tell you to because I won't try to wake you up more than once I promise you that."

"Okay, will do." Gerard says while dragging the mattress to the end of my bed and starting to put the sheets on it. "We're gonna sleep now too so don't worry, we won't trash your room. What time is it by the way"

I pull my phone out and show him that it's 10:32. I guess we'd spent a longer time in the restaurant than we thought.

"Okay cool, I drive Frank to school with me and then you go over on your own, right?" I ask Gerard as he lays down his sheet.

"Yup."

"Awesome."

"Alright done!" Frank says with a pretty unnecessary amount of pride given how all he's done is finished making their bed with a black blanket. "Let's get in, I'm tiiiired." He whines, pushing Gerard down on the mattress and crawling on top of him slowly.

"You literally look like mating slugs, get under your blanket and go to sleep." I say while turning off my light and jumping in bed. "Goodnight."

As I nuzzle my pillow I hear two "I love you's" exchanged and smile, daydreaming about Phil and I doing the same.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my last pre-written chapter so be ready for irregular updates!!! Fml


	12. Reality Is a Bitch

Waking up has never been my favorite part of the day, having to push myself up and out of my cocoon of blankets is simply not as enjoyable as other people find it to be. I honestly don't understand those who do, why the hell would you want to regain consciousness after such peace, such impenetrable nirvana? If I had the choice I would dream for the rest of my life, just dream about the impossibilities of my real life and live the way I wish to. Live without my nosy mother, without the stress that Coach gives me, without the knowledge of what Frank did to me; but with Phil. Hugging Phil, kissing Phil, lying next to Phil, listening to every word coming from his pretty little lips.

But reality is a bitch and it will slap me awake every morning in the form of my alarm screaming at me from my bedside table.

"Will you turn that fucking thing off before I launch it across the room?" I hear Gerard groan from the foot of my bed and I rub the sleep out of my eyes. The alarm continues to pound into my head as I flop my hand around to turn it off, hitting it against the sharper edges of my clock at least ten times before actually succeeding.

"Thank you!" Frank says, yawning. I slowly push myself up and feel the cool autumn breeze stream in through the window and hit my bare back. After stretching my arms I stand up and walk over to see my friends struggling to get the sheets untangled from their legs and, somehow, Frank's neck.

"Help me, Dan!" He yelps as Gerard attempts to roughly yank it away from his head which only succeeds in giving his boyfriend whiplash and some serious abrasion on the back of his neck. "Ow, Gee!"

"You guys are so ridiculous." I shake my head and reach down to grab the end of the blanket and spin it back around my friend's neck, effectively releasing him.

"Thanks, man." He says before pushing against Gerard's chest to get up from the slowly deflating air mattress. His boyfriend lets out a grunt as he reaches his feet and then pushes himself up off of the bed, wrapping his arms around his waist.

"Why's it so fucking cold in here?" He complains, rubbing his hands up and down his arms quickly.

"Because it's fall, dumb ass." I walk over to the window and shove it closed. "And I sleep with the window open."

"Well why the hell do you do that?"

"So that you guys can get in when you sneak in at night so don't fucking complain." I roll my eyes at him and he leans down to start stripping the mattress he had slept on. "Plus I like to hear the birds in the morning, sue me."

"Will do." He looks up at me, smirking.

"Awesome," I roll my eyes and walk over to my closet, not wanting to have to deal with Gerard any more this morning, I already hate being awake at this ungodly time in the morning, I don't want to deal with a whining seventeen year old.

"You two are such idiots." I hear Frank groan as I rummage flick through my shirts hanging in front of me, trying to decide whether I should actually attempt to wear some colors today. I don't think I did yesterday...

"Oh absolutely, Frankie. You love it though." Turning around with a moth button up in hand I'm graced with the sight of Gerard wrapping his arms around Frank's waist, nuzzling his nose into his boyfriend's pale neck. Frank starts to giggle, placing his hands on top of Gerard's lightly and crinkling his nose as he bends over slightly, his vertebrae making little bumps in his back.

"Gee! Stop that! You're too cold!" He screeches and I shush them quickly.

"My mom cannot here you guys!"

"Oh right," Frank says, separating Gerard's hands at his navel and pushing him away from him. "Sorry about that."

"It's okay just I don't want you guys to die by Karen." I say, pulling on my shirt and starting to button it up.

"Yeah that doesn't sound fun." Frank laughs and I watch as his eyes drag across the wall of my room where my bed is and eventually rest on my face. He smiles. "So how long until we have to go?"

"Let me check," I walk over to my desk and unplug my phone from its charger, turning it on for a moment. "About twenty minutes."

"Okay cool, will I get food?"Gerard asks and I gnaw on my lip, thinking about what could happen if either of them were to be alone in a room with my mother.

"I could grab you something if you want? I don't think it would be a good idea for you go anywhere when my mom is home." I toss my phone from hand to hand and watch as my friends start getting dressed.

"Then could you grab me a bee-"

"I'm not giving you alcohol, Gerard."

"Well why no-"

"We'll have anything." Frank interrupts Gerard who we all know was about to become an actual second grader.

"Preferably poptarts though!"

So he did anyway.

"Oh yeah definitely poptarts if possible!"

And so did his boyfriend.

"Fine I'll check for poptarts." I groan while walking toward my bed where I had dropped my black jeans that I will now have to spend an embarrassing amount of time pulling up over my thighs.

"Awesome!" Gerard cheers and starts rummaging through his bag for who-knows-what.

"Before you go though," Frank starts as I'm getting my pants over my flat ass. "Can I choose a shirt from your closet? I forgot to grab one last night."

"Sure go for it." I roll my eyes and button my jeans, shaking my legs a bit to make sure that these jeans don't cut off all circulation to my feet. "Just pick one that I don't wear all the time, I don't need Zack thinking he has more proof of us or something."

"True that." Frank shakes his head and smiles at me as I go down the ramp to leave my room.

As I close the door behind me I hear a distant "Proof about what?" coming from Gerard and grimace, knowing that my friend is about to get a full interrogation from his boyfriend.

"Better get those Poptarts." I mumble and start down the stairs and over to the left to knock on my brother's door. "Are you awake yet, Adrian?"

I hear a groan and smile as I open the heavy door a crack. Peeking in, I see my brother burying his head under his red checked quilt, his feet kicking the sheets underneath his legs. I walk in and almost straight into a pile of dirty clothes on my way over to his bed where I finally stop with my hands on my hips. I reach out and poke his neck.

"Adrian?" Poke. "Adrian?" Poke. "Adrian?" Poke.

"What, Dan?" He suddenly screeches and swings his arm around in an attempt to ward me away but doesn't even get close considering his head is still under the covers. 

"Time to get up, Sleeping Beauty." I start to pull at the edge of his quilt.

"No." He grunts stubbornly and drags the quilt back and pins it underneath his stomach that he has now rolled onto. 

"Come on! It's already six thirty!" I pull on his covers again and he grips them more tightly as I drag his body over to the side of the bed I'm standing at. "You have to get ready!"

"Let me get up on my own, Dan! I'm not wearing a shirt!" He yells before letting go of the blankets and grudgingly pushing himself up. I roll my eyes at him as he rushes over to his cupboard and whips on a flannel, pulling it over his shoulders and together quickly at his navel.

"You think I haven't seen you without a shirt?" I scoff and he shivers, the cold September weather getting to him.

"Not since I was little!" Adrian turns around and grabs a pair of blue jeans, throwing them over his shoulder and onto the floor a few feet behind him, a white undershirt soon following it. 

"That's true but still, you're basically a clone of me when I was thirteen, will you calm down a bit?" I laugh and he hides behind him bed, flustered and trying to put his pants on without letting me see his underwear with a most likely quite embarrassing print on them.

"No! Leave!" He screeches before throwing a shoe that only nearly misses my head and instead, the door behind me.

"Fine!" I yank the door open and then slam it back closed, stomping down the short spiraled staircase. I rub my eyes as I pass through the living room and into the kitchen, not at all expecting to see my mother leaning against the counter sipping at a mug of coffee.

"It's early Daniel, was there any need to slam your brother's door?" She asks sweetly, putting her coffee down next to her lightly, the porcelain barely making a sound.

"Sorry, Mom," I walk farther into the kitchen and toward the cabinet in the corner that we use as a pantry. "He threw a shoe at me so I figured I should leave."

"Oh yes and I'm sure you had to be so dramatic as well." She snaps and I turn back to see her standing there with her eyebrows raised and arms crossed like she's about to say something I won't like and quite honestly I don't give enough of a fuck this morning to care.

Turning back around though, I actually do.

"So is Franklin gay with this Gerard boy?"

My eyes go wide as I open the cupboard and start shifting through for Poptarts.

"No, why would you think that?" I try to play my answer off as casual but don't quite succeed as I can practically feel the smirk on her face.

"Oh I just heard something about that but I'm sure that you would tell me the truth, right Daniel?"

I square my jaw and finally grab a half empty box of strawberry Poptarts sitting in the back of the pantry, most likely stale, most likely disgusting, but I really just most likely don't give a shit if Gerard likes them. "Right, Mom."

"Good," I feel her hand on my shoulder, squeezing after a moment. "I'm glad to hear that."

"Yeah," I turn around to walk out of the kitchen but am instead met with an obviously fake smile on my mother's face. "What is it, Mom?" I sigh, already knowing but figuring that if she's making it this clear that she's unhappy I should just give her the attention she craves.

"Well Daniel, I thought I heard kissing noises in your room last night..." She trails off, her eyes trailing over my face intently, just waiting for me to slip up and give something away about my friends and my relationship with them.

"I don't know why..." I cock an eyebrow at her before starting to walk away from her, her hand dropping off my shoulder where she had places it again after I had turned around. "Sorry I can't stay, we have to leave in like fifteen minutes, can't be late."

"That's right, have a good day," She says, her voice giving away her still standing suspicions about my friends, can't say I'm surprised though given how she didn't exactly receive the most eloquent explanation from my lips.

"Thanks, will do!" I wave goodbye before running upstairs to my room, blowing a large breath out of my mouth, she must've been snooping to have heard Frank and Gerard last night, I wonder what else she heard.

~~~~~

"Here are your goddamn Poptarts, you owe me one." I huff and throw the package at Gerard as I storm in my room.

"Well actually I owe you two," I hear him say from across the room as I start to shove everything I need into my backpack. "Or did you somehow get a box with individually wrapped Popta-"

"Oh shut up, you should be thanking me right now." I look up from my bag to glare at him.

"Well thank you."

"Not just for the Poptarts."

"Well for what else?" Frank speaks up while rolling up the air mattress.

"I just ran into my mother-"

"Gross." Gerard interrupts. I roll my eyes and look over at Frank who already has his eyes on me.

"And she asked me about 'kissing sounds' so you're fucking welcome for covering for you two idiots who decided that having a huge make out session in my house was a great fucking idea."

"We didn't make out, you totally would've woken up if that had happened." Gerard says before bending over to help his boyfriend finish rolling their mattress up and push it under my bed.

"Come on, let's be realistic. You can't be that loud." I scoff.

And somehow as I shoulder my bag they both look up at me at the same time and say:

"Oh yes we can."

"One time our neighbor actually called the police because Gee screamed so much while I was giving him a hickey." Frank says with a level of pride that I don't think I'll even reach when graduating college.

"True story." Gerard grunts while getting up from the floor and walks over to his bag. "Everything look good?" I look around my room carefully and then up at my ceiling before nodding.

"Alright cool, I should probably go now." He says before leaning over to Frank, who is just standing up with his backpack on now, and pressing a kiss to his cheek. "Have a nice day, guys! Don't do drugs, stay virgins, don't beat anyone up unless they totally deserve it, all that jazz."

"Yeah okay, bye Gerard." I shake my head and laugh as he walks out of the door and down the stairs, his feet slamming against the wood so I can even hear when he hits the ground floor with the door closed.

"You ready, Dan?" Frank asks and I nod, walking over to my desk chair to grab my leather jacket and draping it over my arm before striding over to the door, Frank already starting down the stairs. We make our way out of the house a little more quietly than Gerard had and walk over to my Jeep a few minutes ahead of schedule. I hop in and buckle up before looking over to Frank and smiling. "You doing alright?"

"Yeah I'm great." I tell him, only partially lying. His actions from only last week have left a permanent mark on my brain, I can't help but think about his possible raping of me but at the moment I feel great. I feel like I can get through school without dying today. I feel like I can possibly talk to Phil after practice at some point soon.

Five minutes later though I feel my heart drop into my stomach as I pull into the school parking lot, a huge banner hung across the front of the school displaying my name in a heart with Frank's and a caricature of us making out, one line scrawled across the bottom:

Faggots for life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When you finally write a chapter after months and it's short and kinda shitty...
> 
> Thank you to everyone who's reading this even with the last update being so long ago, I love all of you!
> 
> -Bails xx


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